Trying to understand and cope

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handsin

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My husband was in a serious car accident that almost took his life in 2002. He was in a coma and then came out. With support and help of his family, friends and the medical professionals. He was almost back to him self and went back to work less than a year later.

Recently we had a newborn prematurely who had reflux and apnea. I was breast feeding and had to focus a lot of time on him. Shortly after bring our baby home was when he stopped having one seizure every two years or less. He has not been able to drive for over a year now.

He has taken his medicines as prescribed and does not mix with alcohol or other drugs. Went from once maybe every 2 years, 4 every 6 months, 3 every 4 months and finally 2-4 back to back every 3 weeks. However he has recently hurt himself badly at work. I am afraid he will die if he keeps hitting his head, falling down stairs, etc! That is scary!

He is a good husband and dad but he is not always thinking clearly and is playing Russian Roulette try to drive while his seizures are not fully controlled. Hanging out with the baby alone or taking out of the house with out telling me. I am stressed because I have to take care of both of them with out much sleep or help from others. I feel as though I have to watch him and be very alert to make sure they are both safe. We live far from family and friends so we do not get much help. Even just going to shop for grocery's is difficult and I do not want to leave him alone.

I just recently improved my health though I am not 100% better. I want to be at my best so I can properly take care of my family in every way possible. I also want to go back to work, but wonder how that will be managed if my DH episodes continue to increase in how many times a day or hour he has them. As well as how many weeks or months apart before he has a cluster of seizures again. There are no warnings, he just drops, paralyzed, is not aware, can not remember having them or things that happened recently. He twitches and has spasms, follow by sallow breathing and color change to his face. The seizures are not always the same, have changed but mostly they are as described above.

I husband, has seriously injured himself with the last one, Falls frequently into shelves, hard floor or stairs. Not a month ago he was was holding our child and managed to set him down before having one. I came down the hall way as he backed himself out of our child's room and fell. I am fearful of his life, more head injuries or health issues and him being able to be a father and keep a job. All is very important to him and would lower his self esteem.
 
Hi Handsin,

Sorry to hear of your husband's awful car accident and head injury. Unfortunately, seizures do happen after someone has a head injury. Has he told his neurologist about the increase in seizures? A change/increase in medication needs to take place to get the seizures under control. And he NEEDS to stop driving if he is frequently having these seizures. They can and do happen while driving! Someone could be seriously injured. How would that effect his self-esteem?

Do you have friends/neighbors who could help you with running to the store or keeping the baby for you? Can your husband go on disability since his seizures are not controlled yet? You need to talk with the dr. about it.

And check out these websites for more help/info:

http://www.epilepsy.com/get-help/managing-your-epilepsy/understanding-seizures-and-emergencies

http://www.epilepsy.com/get-help/ma...ging-my-seizures-101/epilepsy-self-management

http://www.epilepsy.com/get-help/staying-safe
 
handsin
It is not safe for your husband to be driving while he is having seizures.Have you tried talking to his his doctor about this?Even if he has a spasm while driving he can injure himself or other people .

How about a helmet for him to wear since he is falling so many times?I use to wear one myself.I'd suggest that for him.

You can't keep him in a bubble he does have a life just try to make sure someone is around when he is with your child if his seizures are so bad.
I've survived blood on the brain of falling so many times after 40 odd years.
 
I am very sorry to hear of the issues your husband and you are dealing with. Parts of your situation sound so much like mine (I have the seizures) and my wife's, as well as many others here. It sounds like both of you also have a high amount of stress. My suggestion is to really work on stress reduction. Not only will this help you and your child, it will help your husband too. High stress can be a trigger for seizures (it is for many of us, including me). High stress can also affect many other areas of your health too.

Stay strong and don't give up!
 
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