Depression? Motorcycle? (study break in DD)

[Athena22]

I used to have a therapist, I have friends, Ive just been feeling extremily down lately. I'm not sure why lately.
My sister is moving away, its the holidays?
Ive been contemplating my live, Im failing my classes so bad and my sister whos moving away is the only one whos really helping me out. I'm in DD (dunking donuts) right now for the past two weeks trying to up my grades with her. Shes actually the only one helping.
Not really. My whole family helps me its just I hate the fact that shes moving. I liked that she moved back, because she would drive me around.
I'm happy shes moving, its what I want in a few years when I want on my own.
I cant drive.
I want a motorcycle....Is that even possible w/o a licence? I can get a bike.......
Thinking about being a teacher. Nursing is out of the picture. I'm going crazy over her latey just thinking. What am I reaching for in my life.
I feel so stupid lately. Extremily stupid. I know its bad to think this about my self. But I cant do math : (.
I'm 20, and the absent seizures are coming back the more I THINK?
Maybe this is why I prolonged my studies...
My sister spent 30 minutes trying to explain an equation she did a second ago while I just stared at the table and paper with the pen in my hand.
Whenever I make a noise in my room 'mom' "GLORIA?!"
I'm getting worn out : /
the kittens wouldnt make me as happy as I thought when the cat had her litter.
I'm rewatching tv episodes on netflix I've already rewatched.
My life in a month is going to be extremily depressing.
And my foot still isnt healed.
Why am I saying this?

 

[Fedup]

Athena22

Its ok to feel down, your sister moving is having a big impact on you since you depend so much on her, the thing is you will survive, you carry on, you will succeed, you are a great person and you can do whatever you put your mind too, that does not make it easy for you but you do not want easy, you are a fighter.

So you think your going to be a teacher, you are good and you must be studding a lot, that is not easy, you are putting a lot of pressure on yourself. Its not bad to think things like this, it can normal for you to think things like this but you might want to think about getting some sort of help for yourself, it might help a little.

You are 20 years old, very intelligent, well you have to be thinking about teaching, everything takes time and there are always subjects you will find hard and some more so, so do not be hard on yourself. It does not matter how many times you have to go over something, we all had to do that at some stage.

You can get through all this and look back and think, I hope I never have to do that again.

 

[Nakamova]

fedup's words are very wise.

:hugs:

When your sister moves away can you plan regular phone check-ins or Skyping? I know it's not the same as being right there, but it can help. I talk with my sister and with my best friend pretty regularly.

As for the motorcycle, I hear ya, they're very cool. But best to hold off for now -- they're actually harder to drive than cars! And you do need a driver's license. There are some very nice bikes being made these days, I encourage you to check out what's available.

 

[masterjen]

Definitely harder to drive than cars, according to a guy-friend of mine who learned to ride a motorcycle about 15 years ago. His advice to anyone wanting to ride is to take lessons from an expert. Once you have a handle on riding one on your own it is a whole different matter to have some one hop on behind you, again something requiring a skilled instructor to teach. Apparently it is a situation where both people are essentially driving, as the person in back needs to also know how to move his/her body with the bike and be alert to the movements of the driver as well as what is happening on the road.
It clearly isn't all fun and games. This same guy I'm referring to had a friend who rode motorcycles. One day he and his wife were on his bike on a highway, she in the back. She fell asleep and suddenly the balance of the bike was thrown off and they were both tossed onto the road. The wife died. The husband gave up riding. My friend still rides, but goes to high schools and colleges to raise awareness of the dangers associated with riding a motorcycle without proper instruction and practice.

 

[marika853]

Dear Athena,
I will not tell you to try and get over it because that is too easy a thing to say. I will just say that I DO know your pain! I have felt it too. In 2006 I was working full time in the school system, going to college to try and get a degree in education, worrying about a bipolar son and have a grandchild that perhaps would not survive (lost one grand at 10 days old of congenital heart failure) Our brains and hearts can only take so much stress and then they rebel with seizures. I always hated math and was having a very difficult time with that subject. More stress! Not sleeping well......
Bottom line- We have to take care of ourselves. It does take time. It does get better.
Hugs to You. Hang in there!
M