I feel safe here

[Crowind]

Going to the state university on thurs. Ive gotta ask you folks, Im kinda leary of just telling any Dr. has anyone ever had these sezire's that bring strange thoughts and actions. like murderous thoughts? I have these flashes of bizzar thoughts that seem to be the sezire itself? I get the zapping in my head and become somewhat disorted, I dont want the Dr. to lock me up or anything! but I do want to help the Dr. help me, so is this somthing their gonna have a name for or will they say Im syco? I also have servre panic attacks! if I hear a siren I freak out and have unrelistic worrys about my children ect. I have had problems in the past with violence, they say my eeg was very abnormal, but thats about it. my childhood is not normal so Im not sure if its epilepsy I have. at the age of three I started murdering animals in the most brutal of manner. I was raised in a violent household , Im not sure if that has anything to do with it, I dont know how long Ive had this because Ive always had these problems and this is the first time Ive ever been checked. as a child I liked to be left alone, hated to get around people, well mabey someone can help, it really felt good to tell someone this. I feel good about it. this is the first time I ever spoke of such. thank you. Crowinthewind.

[brain]

Hi Crow,

Are you currently on any medication? Did a
Neurologist send you to the State University
which I am guessing a "Level 4 epileptologist-Center"?
I hope they can assist you at the State!
Good Luck!

[Bernard]

Hi Crowind,

If you don't tell the docs what's happening with you, they are handicapped in trying to help you. You should be open and honest if you want them to be able to help you.

... has anyone ever had these sezire's that bring strange thoughts and actions. like murderous thoughts? I have these flashes of bizzar thoughts that seem to be the sezire itself?

This could be a side effect of certain anti-epileptic drugs. Are you taking Keppra? Also, epilepsy.com has a page about Mood Psychosis and Epilepsy

[Crowind]

the Dr. put me on keppra 3000mg daily. but these strange waves/shocks things have been happening way before the drug.I was just concerned that if I told a Dr. the these kinda things I'd be in a padded cell. or considered unsafe to be around,the last time I had a violent spell was about 5 years ago, where as a man was beat with a steel pipe over a confrontation that I was cornered, and threatened and when I become exited or scared I have these burst of very wrong thinking/ actions problem. I always have.like I stated before they did a ton of testing on me, the EEG is the test that stopped all testing. he only said there where very unusual spikes/ activity on the test, thats all I was told, put on drugs and sent home. guess ill find out more thurs, If my strange behavor as a child is not conected to my problems now Id rather keep it to myself.has anyone heard of a child of three taking and doing these things? Why my parents didnt take me to a Dr then is beyound me! it is said that I would make wooden crosses and put animals on them and burn them. I remember doing these things, but dont remember why I did it, now Im 45 and not violent, but keep having these waves of bad thoughts that seem to be part of my spell/sezere? Ill probably just listen to their talk, and if not asked about strange behavor, just let it slide. thanks. crowinthewind.

[Bernard]

I don't know. You would probably be better off asking your doc if it could be related to E in your case or if you need a referral for a psych doc.

[RobinN]

I think it can be very grounding and comforting to spend time with a psychologist. It is all very private and no one needs to know.Most Insurance companies give a minimum number of visits a year. I think it is very helpful to discuss events that have occurred with someone that has more than 9 min to judge your situation. It is far too difficult to keep this sort of thing bottled up where it can create a life of its own. They can also help you get an over all psychological evaluation.

I hope you can get this sorted out as it must be difficult to live with.

[angel]

the Dr. put me on keppra 3000mg daily. but these strange waves/shocks things have been happening way before the drug.I was just concerned that if I told a Dr. the these kinda things I'd be in a padded cell. or considered unsafe to be around,the last time I had a violent spell was about 5 years ago, where as a man was beat with a steel pipe over a confrontation that I was cornered, and threatened and when I become exited or scared I have these burst of very wrong thinking/ actions problem. I always have.like I stated before they did a ton of testing on me, the EEG is the test that stopped all testing. he only said there where very unusual spikes/ activity on the test, thats all I was told, put on drugs and sent home. guess ill find out more thurs, If my strange behavor as a child is not conected to my problems now Id rather keep it to myself.has anyone heard of a child of three taking and doing these things? Why my parents didnt take me to a Dr then is beyound me! it is said that I would make wooden crosses and put animals on them and burn them. I remember doing these things, but dont remember why I did it, now Im 45 and not violent, but keep having these waves of bad thoughts that seem to be part of my spell/sezere? Ill probably just listen to their talk, and if not asked about strange behavor, just let it slide. thanks. crowinthewind.

crow in the wind,

my brother in law had gone through a lot of abuse as a child he actually has talked with me about some of it but not all.. he to has the bad thoughts sometimes .. he's an alcoholic and used a lot of illegal drugs pot meth and such his dad from what I understand beat him to the point that my brother in law lost his hearing and is deaf in both ears... he stayed with me for two nights while he was living with his mother she was afraid because he would walk around in the night with a hammer and tell her he wanted to kill his brothers "hearing voices"... he was also having seizures they were like grand malls but after a week in the hospital they told him he was having pseudo seizures they seem very real they imo are real seizures .. he has a lot of built up anger and hurt inside which he is trying to work through... " our family is very supportive of him" I talk to him as much as i can when i see him it helps him to talk through things... having someone you can trust to talk to will help you a lot and not using other drugs stopping them helps a lot also( if you are i don't know)... they only numb the pain and do make things worse for your thinking.... If you are hearing voices that are telling you to hurt anyone "please be truthful in the long run it its very helpful for your life and the people around you... your not crazy you have trauma ... "you cant help it just happened to you" .... if your using drugs stop try to quit drinking if you are also caffeine effects my brother and talk to your doctor about keppra because that drug In my IMO can make things worse.. for some people ... most important you need someone to talk things through with you can be open with a counselor or doctor maybe an elder you trust can help to give you advice.... because of voices and i bet mood changes and fear and having to have control of your emotions so you don't hurt yourself or others would be over whelming to you I've seen it first hand with my brother in law...

try to stay calm don't worry and panic about asking for help these things are better treated by doctors and counseling you are not strange you just need to reach out to the people around you who you trust and ask for help " be strong try not to be afraid" you can do it

angel

[angel]

the Dr. put me on keppra 3000mg daily. but these strange waves/shocks things have been happening way before the drug..

http://www.emedicine.com/neuro/topic604.htm

neurology and psychiatry deal with diseases of the same organ—the brain. Predicting interaction between neurologic and psychiatric diseases is not, therefore, unreasonable. The clinical relationship between epilepsy and behavioral disorders remains controversial.
greater incidence of behavioral disorders in patients with epilepsy than in the general population.

Vuilleumier and Jallon estimated that 20-30% of patients with epilepsy have psychiatric disturbances. Tucker reported that one study found that 70% of patients with intractable complex partial seizures had one or more diagnoses consistent with Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Revised Third Edition (DSM-III-R)—58% had a history of depressive episodes, 32% had agoraphobia without panic or other anxiety disorder, and 13% had psychoses. Torta and Keller reported that the risk of psychosis in populations of patients with epilepsy may be 6-12 times that in the general population, with a prevalence of about 7-8% (in patients with treatment-refractory temporal lobe epilepsy, the prevalence has been reported to range from 0-16%). Differences in the rates may result from differences in populations studied, time periods investigated, and diagnostic criteria.

The psychiatric symptoms characteristic of the neurobehavioral syndrome of epilepsy (ie, Morel syndrome) tend to be distinguished in the following ways:

* Atypical for the psychiatric disorder

* Episodic

* Pleomorphic

In studying the relationship between epilepsy and psychiatric disorders, care must be taken to differentiate between the following:

* Psychiatric disorders caused by the seizures of the epilepsy - Ictal disorders, postictal disorders, and interictal disorders

* Epileptic and psychiatric disorders caused by common brain pathology

* Epileptic and psychiatric disorders that happen to coexist in the same patient but are not causally related

Schmitz et al found that multiple interacting biological and psychosocial factors determine the risk for development of either schizophreniform psychoses or major depression in patients with epilepsy and concluded that behavioral disorders in epilepsy had multiple risk factors and multifactorial etiology.

[speber]

C,

I'm gonna put it out there that I PERSONALLY have to believe there is A LOT of really weird f**ked-up sh*t people think about from time to time.

Some more than others sure, but most likely you just don't ever hear about it from the people you might label as those who don't have weird thoughts at all. They keep it to themselves consciously(or subconsciously?) and this is probably a good thing unless you're looking for material for horror flicks.

I had a very hard time on Keppra...and now with Trileptal and Zonegran I'm trying to figure out if it's me or the drugs at times myself.

As intense as your case sounds, I would DEFINITELY seek relief! Remember this...it's kind of 'how' you tell your doctor these things as well. I mean, they probably don't need names, dates, explicit-gory details....just an understanding that your exhibiting these symptoms, right?


Wish you Luck!

[Crowind]

I went to univeristy and seen a doc. that could speak clear english,I did speak of some of the behavior, its diffacult to do when you dont trust humans. he stated that he would like me to see a head dr. (cant spell that word) so I will be getting a appt. soon, he has me this comin tues for a 6 hr eeg? and then go from there, I did not go into detail of the behavior thing as some of the things sound as if someone is watching to much tv. I have had my share of the drinking thing, but havent for about a year now. this thing has destoyed my people before me. and caused me much loss of time and money! I have no one to really speak from my heart to, that is why I say I feel safe here. my elders are mostly gone. but it does feel good to make words here. since you are not here, I can speak freely and hold no fear. thank you all crowinthewind

[brain]

Awesome! so you went to see the
Neurologist and he/she is going to
have you set up for a half-day (6
hour) EEG and also with a Psychologist
or Psychiatrist for an evaluation?

Sounds like you're all in good hands!
Hope all the results will come in and
the Neurologist (or did you see an
Epileptologist?) will be able to treat
you properly from there!

Just hang in there and go to those
appointments that they arranged for
you to go. You'll be glad you did when
it's all over with.

[angel]

I went to univeristy and seen a doc. that could speak clear english,I did speak of some of the behavior, its diffacult to do when you dont trust humans. he stated that he would like me to see a head dr. (cant spell that word) so I will be getting a appt. soon, he has me this comin tues for a 6 hr eeg? and then go from there, I did not go into detail of the behavior thing as some of the things sound as if someone is watching to much tv. I have had my share of the drinking thing, but havent for about a year now. this thing has destoyed my people before me. and caused me much loss of time and money! I have no one to really speak from my heart to, that is why I say I feel safe here. my elders are mostly gone. but it does feel good to make words here. since you are not here, I can speak freely and hold no fear. thank you all crowinthewind

crow in the wind ,
I'm proud of you for quitting drinking i did too.. my family has also suffered from the effects of drinking .. my fathers father died early from it..my dad never did drink that Im aware of my sisters and i were lucky it still effects some of us still drink . I have some black foot and Cherokee Indian in my blood, black Irish and dutch also..... I wasn't raised in the Indian ways though.
and im not sure what black Irish is really but its what my dad told me

I'm praying for you, stay strong and keep your chin up and feel free to speak from your heart...

The 6 hour EEg Ive had... it shows them seizure and brain wave activity

angel

[POSITIVEPERSON]

Hi Crow in the Wind: Welcome to the board and nice meeting you!!!!!

Looking forward to getting to know you.

Riva