Really down

[wonderdogs]

I saw my doctor again and told her that I didn't feel like the medication was working effectively anymore. I told her the episodes I was having, mostly at work. I told her that my co-worker is an alcoholic who breeds drama and she just came back from a 4 week medical leave because her habbit induced a GI Bleed.

In the time that she was gone the management over my department added a long list of responsibilities that we need to comply with. The changes have been difficult for all of us but I feel like they are more difficult for me because when I am having partials I cannot remember what I am doing from one task to the next.

My coworkers know I have Epilepsy but no one has witnessed a seizure because I am in my cubicle with my back to the world and they are not even obvious to ME when I have one until after the fact and they are so breif. I never say anything to my coworkers because I am afraid they won't believe me and even if they did I don't think it's fair that I get special treatment.

So, anyhow, after hearing the above story my doctor was at the conclusion that it was my situation that was to blame for my digression NOT my medication because a month ago I had reported a significant improvement since being on Keppra 1500mg 2x daily. She did decrease my Keppra to 1000mg 2x daily to see if that helps my "fogginess" and if that is the case she will consider changing my medication completely.

Ultimately, though, she wants me to cut my hours at work. She said because of my condition my mind fatigues faster than others and the decrease in hours is medically necessary and should not be viewed as special treatment.

Firstly, I cannot afford a decrease in pay. Second, I feel bad for my coworkers who will be short handed once again. Third, I am afraid my other coworkers will base opinions on me the way we have all based opinions on the alcoholic coworker.

Anyway, I don't know what kind of advice I am looking for. None really, I guess, just some support from others who might understand the mess I am in.

[wonderdogs]

Can I add, the coworker was GONE for 4 weeks, returned last week, and called in sick today. Lovely.

[Bernard]

You gotta do what you gotta do and don't worry what others think. Otherwise, you are going to replace one stress (work) with another (social).

[brain]

I agree with Bernard 100%, who gives
a flip with what others say or do or think
for that matter; after all you have your
own HEALTH at stake and you don't need
to be tripping seizures or making things
screwy because some screwball coworker
wants to be (insert your cuss-word here).

Your Health comes first!

(((((( More Hugs to You! ))))))))

[BuckeyeFan]

It is good that you care about your co-workers, but do not let your health care be impacted by their workload. If you broke your leg, no one would question your temporary cut back or your special needs. Epilepsy is no different than any other health problem except that it is invisible unless you have a tonic-clonic seizure.

I take Keppra as well (along with phenytek). 3000 mg a day is a pretty strong dose. I am on 2000 mg and I have to fight the concentration problems all the time. Try to have patience until your dr finds what works for you.

On the other hand, the reduced income is a very harsh reality and sadly there are not a lot of answers we can give you on that one. Try to be aware of alternative sources of income. Sorry, not much help here.

[stilldancing_98]

No, fighting on that stuff is something I know a little about.PM Kendra, if you want and I can maybe give you some hints depending on what you want to do.

[tinasmom]

Have you thought about going to your boss and just letting him/her know what the doctor said? Could you ask for a lighter workload so there is less stress? I know that opening up to your coworkers can be a scary situation, but then again you might find them very understanding. Unfortunately, people like to gossip and there may be a few that won't understand. You can take a family medical leave with your doctors approval. You might just need some time to destress. I hope that everything will work out for you.

[RobinN]

Hope all is better in the morning. It is quite challenging out in the real world. I don't have much to offer, other than be positive. It attracts good things.

[wonderdogs]

Thank you all for your support. I am still getting by, barely. I am trying to write everything down so I remember stuff but then there is the issue of having to remember to write things down. Loose loose situation there.

There is a new director of our department (she is basically my boss' boss' boss) who started last week. She said that she wanted to meet with each of us individually to get to know who we are and what we do. I might use that oppertunity to let her know the kind of pressure our department is under. I will try not to make it personal to me. I think if they hired another staff member it would help out immensely.

I have also considered seeing the employee health nurse. I know I had to disclose any medical condition that could affect my job when I was hired but I was not diagnosed with E until this past December.

[skillefer]

Hi Kendra! Wow! You've been through the wringer huh? Well, I'll keep you in my prayers. I know you aren't looking forward to shorter hours, but you may have to do it. If the whole department would benefit from another staff member, than I think that that is a good suggestion to make. Also, I totally agree with the idea about seeing the health nurse. That way, they can't turn around and say that you hid the E from them. Plus, they may have special protocols for dealing with E. At my job, they automatically call an ambulance unless you have your neurologist fill out a special protocol form indicating otherwise.

[wonderdogs]

I guess i didn't mention, I work for a hospital.

I could be going out on a limb here but I HOPE someone around here knows SOMETHING about epilepsy!

[skillefer]

ROTFLMAO.....let's hope!

[tinasmom]

Kendra - I think that meeting with the new director would be a great opportunity for you to discuss your concerns. I also work at a hospital and I know that they like to have documentation on why extra staff is needed. You might find that you feel very comfortable with this new director. It certainly is not doing you any good to keep everything to yourself either.