Depression

[RobinN]

I think you made a good choice TT. Sometimes we just can't fight 'em. Better to use the energy elsewhere.

[nadine deutsch]

make a special place in your home for when you come home from work that makes you feel good like a small water fountain and some plants otherwise the stress from work will make you more likely to have a seizure and i don't know but if you are like me and have a job my co-workers know i have health problems but they don't know that i have epilepsy because in my line of work i would be let go so have that special place at home or vent out by listening to your fav tunes while going for a walk

[alivenwell]

I'm better off when I'm busy and not thinking of the epilepsy. Overload is a totally different thing. If I get laid off or fired, I'll be taking courses online or working out to get rid of the stress.

My coworkers know about my epilepsy. I know some incorrect information was passed on to newer people because they practically avoided contact with me. Now, they are associating with me for some unknown reason.

I'm going through the opposite situation. I'm being placed on simpler stuff which is hardly a challenge. But, my workplace allows us freedom to take online courses. In between boredom, I'll be hooked up to training online with headphones. Or, I'll go for external training that they have to pay for (pretty expensive). I'm looking into getting a 3rd technical certification. They can't take that away.

I deal with a few people who use other people. I'm not sure why they are still there. It must be tenure, seniority, emotional intelligence, or something else...who knows?! They're good looking. I guess that counts for something.
My ace in the hole is my 2 college degrees, some related certification and my ability to pick up new technology quickly and use it.

Maybe your boss means to accommodate the epilepsy, but has absolutely no clue how to approach it. He sounds kind of dense. If you think it's deliberate, keep a written record of your workload.

[TeeTees]

I think you made a good choice TT. Sometimes we just can't fight 'em. Better to use the energy elsewhere.

That's kinda the way I made the final decision - I was just getting so tired lately that my life was becoming a trivial lump of 'going to work, getting home, crashing out in the chair' as I simply had zero energy to do anything else. At this point, where it's having an effect on my 'outside work' life, is when the decision was made that I need O-U-T.

I've basically stuck two fingers up to the workload, and hell, if it keeps accumulating then it keep accumulating <shrugging shoulders>

My name's down with a few agencies now, so hopefully the countdown to leaving this place isn't too far away.

[Meetz1064]

Is there someone over him that you can go to? A bossman for the bossman? This is RIDICULOUS! And what about Human Resources? Do you have an HR Department that you can talk to? It almost sounds like he has it out for you........

[TeeTees]

Is there someone over him that you can go to? A bossman for the bossman? This is RIDICULOUS! And what about Human Resources? Do you have an HR Department that you can talk to? It almost sounds like he has it out for you........

Here's the funny part (you gotta laugh at it really)...his boss is no longer here, and the replacement isn't turning up until next month.

HR aren't really interested as they'd just prefer to 'Hear No Evil'. I did mention it to the HR girl, and she said about ME confronting bossman (Ian) and telling him how I feel....that didn't work !

I think really it's just a sign - get the hell out of here and find somewhere else where people care about others.

[Katz]

I know I said I was history but I'd say there is nothing you can do about it and get out there and do what you enjoy.

You have nothing left to lose and everything to prove. So go out there and do what you believe is right because you are near death on you can sit and feel sorry for yourself. It is your choice no one can make it for you. You can get up and fight or lay sown and die. No one can choose for you that is all I gotta say on the subject.

[Cinnabar]

Anybody else struggle with this ?

I feel as though I'm going through a real rough patch at the moment, and I'm typing this in my lunch-break at work, as I really don't wanna be here at the moment. I work with quite a nice bunch of people, but for some reason, inside me I'm feeling like I just wanna get up and walk.

It's really happened since I come back from my weekend break in Cornwall. On the Tuesday I turned up at work, there was a huge pile of work left on my desk. When I questioned why it was there, the 'person' told me that it's extra work that has been passed onto me due to the other person being over-worked. <grrrrr> So I responded by saying that SHE's not the only person over-worked in this place (I think this is where the depression/anxiety started), to which she replied "this is non-negotiable" - which made me mad.

I sat there and bit my tongue for a couple of days. Went and seen Bossman and asked him if he knew anything about the shifting of workloads, and he said no. I explained to him that I felt it was necessary for the other person to keep the work, and get on with it, a: so they can LEARN how to do the job, and b: cuz she's always creeping off for cigarette breaks..so don't tell me she's bogged down with work !!

Bossman agreed with me, and said he'll tell the other 'un about the circumstances.....which he hasn't done....and has now took a couple of days off work....greeeat !

I just feel as though, what with all this cr@p, plus the seizure's I been having lately, I'm just stooping into a depression (again!). Part of me would just sooo love to get up and walk out, but I've done that in previous jobs and it's hell trying to find another so easily located and with a bunch of people who aren't all THAT bad.

Maybe I should just try a ride the wave ?

I dunno. I just needed to vent off somewhere.

I wish I had some answers for you but as I'm in the whole of depression tonight, I can only identify and hope that helps. I'm exhausted because my mind is working over time. I worry myself into depressions. I become paranoid and that somehow leads to the depression. I fear I'm going to bring a seizure on but when you're depressed you often don't take good care of yourself physically. Since, my first seizure two years ago, I've dropped down to 90 pounds. I get anxiety/depression combo and my stomache just locks up. I know I should be asleep right now but this depression is imobilizing me. I sit. I think. And something in me refuses my mind to rest. I understand the all of what you're saying....it sucks to be in the "hole". Always - Laurie

[hawke86]

I know what you mean Laurie. I hope everyone feels better soon.

[alivenwell]

When's the last time you had a good vacation? Sometimes a total change in your environment can be a good thing. I was away for ONE week and came back to work. I was told I was a much more relaxed person. When I was on vacation, I worked out, ate well, took naps when I felt like it, and went into a totally nontechnical environment...away from the usual techie stuff I do at work. It was great!

When I came back, I found the things that would normally make me very uptight actually humorous. They were so ridiculous to take seriously.

[Cinnabar]

When's the last time you had a good vacation? Sometimes a total change in your environment can be a good thing. I was away for ONE week and came back to work. I was told I was a much more relaxed person. When I was on vacation, I worked out, ate well, took naps when I felt like it, and went into a totally nontechnical environment...away from the usual techie stuff I do at work. It was great!

When I came back, I found the things that would normally make me very uptight actually humorous. They were so ridiculous to take seriously.

Looking forward to going Fla this Oct. My depressed days come and go e.g. I feel better this morning. In the evening I always hope for a new perspective. L-

[hawke86]

I hope you have fun in Florida Laurie.

[Cinnabar]

I hope you have fun in Florida Laurie.

Looking forward to it! L -

[Katz]

I'm thinking to quit driving give up my license to drive send it in saying I don't want it just to be done with all their nonsense once and for all. Associate driving with freedom but they soured it so I'd rather beat them up some and destroy a few of them before I leave this state than pretend it isn't happening to me because they will do what they want no matter what I think is right and it's time they went down for it. I'm going to leave them beaten up I figure if they want to revoke my license I can give them a few whacks first. Even if I lose my license to drive I can keep destroying them until they realize their mistake. Depression is anger turned in ward. So who are you mad at other than yourself?

[BuckeyeFan]

Depression is anger turned inward. So who are you mad at other than yourself?

I don't know that all depression matches your quote - but that is a great description for some types of depression.

Some of my worse days are when I am upset with my own failures. However, I was depressed over the loss of my father several years ago and other facts of life that just happen. This includes epilepsy. It depresses me, but I can't be mad at myself for that, I didn't do anything to cause it.

[Cinnabar]

I'm thinking to quit driving give up my license to drive send it in saying I don't want it just to be done with all their nonsense once and for all. Associate driving with freedom but they soured it so I'd rather beat them up some and destroy a few of them before I leave this state than pretend it isn't happening to me because they will do what they want no matter what I think is right and it's time they went down for it. I'm going to leave them beaten up I figure if they want to revoke my license I can give them a few whacks first. Even if I lose my license to drive I can keep destroying them until they realize their mistake. Depression is anger turned in ward. So who are you mad at other than yourself?

When able to drive I'd think/complain that my car was too old and unattractive to drive, I'd then stop myself and say "What would I do without it!" The very idea of loosing this independance was inconcievable! And I'd thank my lucky stars that I had it. Now, not being able to drive, I'm mostly at home - a breeding ground for depression. In time, I'll drive but driving myself crazy (which I do do sometimes) is pointless. I get involved with my writing. Thank God I have that interest! It keeps my mind off myself. Do you have any diversions?
Always - Laurie

[Cinnabar]

I don't know that all depression matches your quote - but that is a great description for some types of depression.

Some of my worse days are when I am upset with my own failures. However, I was depressed over the loss of my father several years ago and other facts of life that just happen. This includes epilepsy. It depresses me, but I can't be mad at myself for that, I didn't do anything to cause it.

Happens sporadically. But when it does it's like your mind is jumping on a trampoline (anxiety) and the trampoline is wound tight, (depression). Depression makes your mind "flat" and Anixety makes your mind rise and fall. I don't know if they take turns so quickly as if to "meld" but throughtout my life I've always wondered which is worse? It's like a mixing of the stuff for a bad coctail. Laurie

[hawke86]

Does anyone experience PTSD other then me? I have this more then ten years. Somedays are good, somedays are bad. I keep getting flashbacks of something that happened in the past. It happened at one of the jobs I use to work. I also have them at accidents that happened in my past. I guess the flashbacks will never go away. I just have to learn to deal with it.

[haird18]

Hawke,
In my opion I think people who have epilepsy or any brain disorders can experience some sort of depression! ever since I was 4yrs. old I have experienced anxiety, depression,sleeplessness,bi-polar,ptsd, and severe stress that caused a breakdown! So what you feel always let a professional know what is going on in your life!
David Hair

[stilldancing_98]

I don't have to much to complain about . I have my days like every body else. It's been tough and I have had my battles. But lately I have been down for know reason. I take celexa for depression. Ever since the coma. This week is the first time I have felt this down in years. I am shaking, not eating well. It's chemical. I can tell.But paying just one bill can seem like to much. Teresa