New addition to my family

[Birdbomb]

My husband suffers from moderate dementia. This past year it's gotten progressively worse so now he is no longer driving. He is a handful to say the least. Lost his keys again. Falls and trips easily but refuses to use a cane or his walker. Forgetful and has difficulty expressing himself. Very argumentative and suffers from "grumpy old man" syndrome.

Now today he's been blessed with the diagnosis of diabeties. Oh joy, not that he listens to me or anyone else, keeping this under control will be nothing short of a miracle.

It's times like these I really miss my friend Riva. She was my mentor in handeling these issues. Her father suffered from dementia, she took care of him until his death and she was so knowlegable. (sigh)

I watched my maternal grandparents and my mother suffer from this insidious soul stealing disease and now after 32 years, my husband is a stranger in my house. Never thought growing old together would be like this.

[alivenwell]

It sounds like you'll need an occasional break. Is there any organization there which can occasionally take care of him for one day while you escape?

Maybe with the combination of diabetes and dementia, he may forget what sweets he loved at one time.

It's my understanding that a high carbohydrate diet is really bad for diabetes. The carbohydrates are immediately stored as sugar. A high protein and high fiber diet is good for diabetes from what I heard from nutritionists.

[Bernard]

Has the doc recommended a low glycemic diet?

Sorry to hear about the new diagnosis BB. I know you have a lot on your plate.

[brain]

Have you considered taking him to the what they
call "Day Care Center", where you can drop him
off for a few hours to half a day? My own mom
would do this once or twice a week with our dad,
she had to - or otherwise, she'd loose her sanity,
for he had both AD & PD.

Then when it progressed on, the Doctors recommended
that he go in for a full day, for they included therapy
and so on - so they worked with him and he enjoyed
it there. And this was a tremendous break for my mom
who was then able to get a lot more things done around
the house and take a breather. And sometimes just
sit down and do nothing and rest.

They have State Funded Programs and all sorts of
assisted funded programs regardless of age, sex,
etc - and think it like "Babysitting Service" but it's
just the opposite - they get to do things over there
so you can check around for some places without
stressing yourself out.

Or even better yet, talk to the Doctor for some
recommendations - they can put in referrals and
so on, in fact, some States will actually have a
pick up and drop off services on specific days for
patients. Every State is different, and some requires
Doctor's orders and some do not.

[Birdbomb]

He goes to a senior center a couple of times a week to play cards, shoot pool to have field trips, and stuff, but with his inability to monitor his own behavour, they get tired of him sometimes. He is a VET and getting the VA to even listen to me is imposible. They keep switching psychratric docs on him every 3-6 months. They are doing his work-up for treatment now. I have had a lot of experiance with diabeties, my best friend has Type 1, he's taught me a lot!

[Nancy]

I don't know how you do it ..... I don't know how you do it ...........

[skillefer]

Wow BB.....I don't know how you do it......

[Birdbomb]

You do what you have to do. See my signature? THIS is one of the reasons why I have it. I make my priorities and let the rest go.

He has his good days but they are getting farther and father apart. When things are really hetic, I can't post as much as I'd like. But CWE has gotten so big, it's hasn't even been noticed. LOL.

Today is a good one for him, so I see if I can motivate him into helping with the Halloween decorations.

[Meetz1064]

You have more OOMPH than I would......

[Birdbomb]

Just call me Wonder Woman!

[ashmstng]

I am sorry to hear that Birdbomb! I can say that has to be stressful but I hope you keep your humor going. I want you to know and I sure others do too. I know we are not over in the same area to help you but if you ever need anything we are here for you. Just like you have done for alot of us. Take care and God Bless!

[Birdbomb]

Thank you all for your support and replies.

I try not to post too much personal stuff about myself for several reasons, most people could not believe the amount of stress I have to deal with, the strangest things gravitate towards me, and I have had a cyberstalker for the past 5 years who feeds off everything I post.

Today I checked one of my old email accounts and sure enough, this man had sent me a response to this thread! Unbelieveable! No matter how many times I have told this creep and I'm saying it again LEAVE ME ALONE!
I don't care what he has to say, I want NO contact from him whatsoever!

[salright2baredneck]

Cyberstalkers are getting to be such a problem that the authorities are finally starting to accept it as a serious problem and have been passing legislation to protecting people against it. Check out this link on cyberstalking:
http://www.ncvc.org/ncvc/main.aspx?d...cumentID=32458

[Birdbomb]

Thank you, excellent information on that one.

[tinasmom]

My prayers are with you. It has to be so difficult for you.

[Birdbomb]

Got somthing to take my mind off my worries. My longtime girl friend, V, called me this evening to pick her up from the hospital. Her mother had a bad stroke this morning. Flo had surgery last week to remove a tumor from her stomach the size of a football. I guess she threw a clot early this morning. It's pretty bad at the present time, she's not making sense, looks real odd and totally incontinent. V is just a wreck. I hate to see my friend in so much pain. They just bought a new house and in the middle of moving and she job just switched her to swingshift. Boy, when it rains it pours!

[brain]

Big Hugs for you! So sorry to hear all of
this! Hope things turns around for you
and quickly!

[Nancy]

Know what Bird?
I wish you lived closer .......
I could use some help and you'd be the first person I'd call.

You're one heckava' strong woman.

[seizures4ever]

BB,

I admire you. You are one strong woman! But even the strongest people get tired of carrying so much around day after day...know that we are all here for you.

I think you handle yourself beautifully, and your friends must too, that is why they all lean on you..but who do you lean on? Do you have someone face-to-face that you regularly spill your guts to? I do, my therapist, no one else I know can handle hearing about all that I carry around day after day. You need a place to release pressure too, I hope you have one.

Take care of yourself. God knows you have your hands full taking care of everyone else. My thoughts, prayers, and hugs are with you.

(((Much love))),
Julie

[Birdbomb]

Nancy, if you want a loyal and caring friend, pick a Leo. (August baby) We are tenaciously loyal and caring but cross us too many times and you're toast. And if you ever visit or move to Vegas, you can bet I will spend time with you! I like meeting folks I chat with on-line.

Julie, I do have someone, but his dying. David has been my rock and he calls me daily just to see how I'm holding up. When he's gone, I will break but I don't think of that time, because NOW is what's important not the future. I've had to be strong because I had little or no family support, ever.

Brain! Look at my kitties! They have brought us such joy! They are the neatest cats I have ever owned.