Dean Calvin died in May 1987. He was my second child a full term stillborn. He weighed 6 pounds and 13 ounces. I had a seizure - tonic clonic, and he was quickly deprived of oxygen. They induced labor, and he was born into a dimly lit delivery room. It still feels strange to talk about him many years later. The depth of my grief has lessened, but I occasionally still get way down there for a few moments. I can feel that deep loss and then I move on. I have his picture in a small frame, thankfully the nurse took snapshots of him even though he was gone. He looked like me. I miss what could have been and will never be. Thankfully I have a son and daughter for whom I am grateful for. I also have a granddaughter and grandson on the way!