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Old 10-03-2018, 06:16 AM
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Smile How to spend time?

Morning. At least in my little corner of the Midwest.

My doctor wants me to take the better part of a year 5-8 months to become stable. Problem is, even when I was dealing with constant seizures I at least tried to work (sometimes with success, sometimes not). I found working from home was the best choice. I think she may be right though. Sometimes, I can't keep my eyes open long enough to even sit at my desk. I have had several careers, adult education teacher/ESL, web developer, social worker, and now for several years librarian. How do people spend their time? I went from constant seizing to constant side effects. I fell asleep watching an old movie in the middle of the day yesterday!

I am reading a book on communist East Germany (stories of brave people trying to escape the Stasi), but I have not made significant progress.

I have a desire to go back to school when this is all over, to get my master's in education in adult literacy and basic education or ESL. Are there any teachers out there? I love teaching more than life itself, or I wouldn't get an additional degree. I found a clear purpose in life and I miss the energy of a college campus and my former place of work. Contrary to a lot of the discussions in politics right now, my students are some of the best people I have ever met, hardworking people who deserve a chance. I have helped them get their papers in order and made lifelong friends.

I am getting into my 30s. Is it too late for me? The irony of this question dawns on me, as I want to help adults to fulfill their educational goals, often late in life. I have been raised to constantly critique myself by dad and mom. My mother, who's family was from Saxony-Anhalt in the GDR always told me a good German follows the rules and that everything has its place. What if I want to define my own path? Is that wrong? I would like to do some things for myself. I feel as though I have lost my faith in my Catholicism with all that is going on right now, so where do I go from here?

Anyway, just some thoughts this morning. Those of you who have been following my comments in the past weeks, please keep me in thoughts. I have blood work today to see if I can remain on Trileptal. I don't want to have wasted my time on this drug, just when side effects are more manageable and seizures are stopping.

Thanks for reading,

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Old 10-03-2018, 08:23 AM
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Good luck with the blood work, I hope you get the desired result.

For things to pass the time, I recommend outdoor activities and ones that connect you with other people. Volunteering is always a good way to benefit yourself and others.

And it's not too late for you to explore different ways to fulfill your personal and professional goals. I know plenty of folks who have made career changes and/or other changes much later in life, more than once! A friend of mine who worked in construction for twenty years took the classes to get ESL-certified and then spent a year in Vietnam teaching English. Another person I know has had careers as a documentary producer, art photographer, senior aquarist at the local aquarium (she started as a volunteer and worked her way up), and now in organic farming.

Don't let your parents' negativity define you (any more than you would let epilepsy define you).

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Old 10-03-2018, 11:48 AM
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My suggestion is to focus on what you can do instead of what you can't.
I've been retired on disability for more than ten years now and it took me a long time to find a niche. I've found that learning new hobbies and volunteering to help others have worked. I too am a Catholic and am disappointed in what is being revealed. However I don't let that stop my faith because I don't believe the actions of a few outdo the work of many. Since you like teaching you may wish to consider teaching religious education classes at your church you that you may have a positive impact on Catholics new and old.
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Old 10-03-2018, 07:32 PM
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I feel what you're saying regarding disappointment.

I converted to Catholicism with my mother when I was a teen. I really appreciated our Faith and it was a deep well for me. It was better than what I was doing at the time, as I was involved in an infamous young person's organization (that will go unnamed) that promoted militant atheism, among other beliefs. All of my family on my mother's side are militant atheists. And they constantly assault our faith and participation in the Catholic religion. I find that I am tired of trying to resist what they are saying. I went from a young man who spent years in discernment and formation with the Cistercian monks, very sure of what I thought God was calling me to do to a young man who feels defeated. I haven't confronted my relatives since the news of what has been going on in the Church, but they are hard people and will probably jump on the chance to make a severely critical comment, the kinds of comments that break one down psychologically. On the flip side, they are really strong on science and my family on my mom's side helped me to navigate this whole process, particularly my uncle.
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Old 10-08-2018, 02:14 PM
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i would just try to find something you can earn a good buck doing and allow yourself to diffuse and relax.

For me, being able to take it easy and work have been tough to do at the same time.

The only reason i WOULDN'T go back to school if you do not believe you will be able to re-coup the money spent on going in the first place.

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Old 10-08-2018, 04:20 PM
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thanks for your reply. I found out that I can teach without getting another degree. I already have a Master's degree and I worked in that field for a while, but there are a lot of bad memories of being sick at work. I talked to my sister who is in education, and she recommends it as a career. In my family, we get into fields that don't pay well but that are needed, so I think that she understands my desire to work with people in this way. It feels really good and you get to help people, so I think I am going to go for it when I get my health better. As you suggest, I am doing something temporary - writing projects that I am going to probably self-publish. Also, trying to stay positive.


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Old 10-10-2018, 03:35 PM
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All the best
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Old 10-10-2018, 04:58 PM
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find a hobby that requires focus or teach english s a second language.
if you really want to achieve some complicated learn to knit. and make something you thought you couldnt.
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