Getting nervous!

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Claire7

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Hi everyone, hope you are all well!!!

Thought I would send a post here for a little bit of reassurance by you lovely people!
It's now been 5 months since my seizure and I have been feeling ok. I'm starting to feel a bit nervous and scared now as I'm due to get my driving license back in a month. Is it normal to feel like this?? I just am so desperate for everything to return to 'normal' so that I can take my children to school etc again and get back into a routine but I'm so terrified that my luck will run out and I'll be back to square 1!
I am taking medication 200mg of lamotrigine which was my decision to take. Luckily I haven't had any side effects. I just feel that I am analysing everything that has happened. My first seizure incidence in August 2008 was put down to a fainting fit as I was pregnant at the time, had just jumped out of bed and my blood pressure was low. I also had a big build up of stress going on. After this episode i had no confusion, i still remember everything from the time i woke up, no headache, no loss of urine although my bladder would have been full!
also no sleepiness or muscle soreness (i guess i was lucky) When I had my son 4 months after this my body went through a massive ordeal as I had a major placental abruption which was followed by an emergency c-section under general anaesthetic as well as pre-eclampsia and 3 litres of blood loss! I was talking to one of the doctors after this who said that if I had a seizure disorder I would have definitely had one then as it was only 4 months after the 1st and my body had just gone through hell!

The seizure I had in July this year in my sleep was also during a massive build up of stress, not eating properly, just coming off a new pill that didnt agree with me combined with a heavy period. Again I recovered quickly apart from the shock of having another one and a little confusion when I woke up but it was the middle of the night too!!!

After seeing the neurologist and having a clear MRI and EEG he contributed this to be 2 one off events with the 2nd one being the 'perfect storm' for a seizure. I do know someone else who had 2 seizures but only a couple of years apart which was also put down to stress and not eating properly. She is not on meds and has had no more seizures but looks after herself better now.

The neuro didn't recommend meds as the 2 episodes were so far apart but I said I wanted them as I couldn't cope with the stress and worry or having another one.

I'm just feeling now that I am 'looking' for other seizure symptoms now. I am going through a cycle of worrying about it and thinking that every little single thing could be another type of seizure and then when I am relaxing or not thinking about it, I feel absolutely fine!!!

I keep trying to tell myself that I had 4 years with no meds and no problems and the meds I am taking now are my reassurance along with trying to reduce stress and eating regularly.

I just feel that I need a bit of reassurance from people that know how I feel that this is normal and I will feel better as time goes on!!!

Any advice will be welcome!
 
I feel like this at times also. I know getting your d/l back is a big deal for us, so that us get some form of normal back.

Try to focus on something else right now, this I know is easier said than done.
YOU will adjust and be OK.

You are not alone.

HUGS!!!!!!!
 
You are totally normal! My fingers are crossed for you to get your license back!
 
Thank you so much! I know the advice on here is always great! It's my little boys 4th birthday today and I am so thankful that we are both here as it was touch and go for us with the traumatic birth so I am trying to focus on enjoying his special day and trying not to worry!!!
 
You are doing great! You're probably feeling both positive stress ("Yay! I can drive!") and negative stress ("But what if something happens?"). The main thing is to acknowledge the stress for what it is -- a very normal reaction to an upcoming milestone -- and put it in its place. If you don't already, you might want to have some set routines or techniques for dealing with stressful moments -- along the lines of taking 5 minute breaks a few times a day just to focus on your breathing or on tensing and relaxing your muscles. It can help to do this proactively -- i.e. when you are feeling fine -- just to get in the habit of having a regularly scheduled "venting".

A recent study found that it can actually help to write down any negative thoughts you are having on a piece of paper, and then throw the piece of paper away. Worth a try...
 
That's great advice Nakamova! I'm on the waiting list for CBT as I feel I need help with dealing with stress as I don't cope very well at all. I have coped a little bit better since I started on the lamotrigine but I'm not sure if that's the meds doing their job with the mood side of things! I'm looking forward to chilling out over Christmas as I am working so much at the moment. I work for an entertainments venue where they put on concerts etc to its a very busy time right now which is certainly not helping with stress! I'm sooooo tired right now!!!!
 
I hope you can get caught up on sleep soon. Being tired really does make everything else harder.
 
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