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First, I want to say how great it is that you all come here to talk and get opinions about epilepsy. I have a sister who is 30 years old, she has had it since she was 14. Right now she is down at the hospital in Phila PA being monitored to see if she is a candidate for surgery on the front right temporal lobe of her brain. She has been incredibly depressed for a long time now, she has lost a tremendous amount of weight and I have tried talking to her about how important her health is. She does not exercise, doesn't eat right, drinks soda, does not take vitamins and the worst part of it all, she smokes cigarettes! Have any of you battled depression? Is there anything that I can do for her? I am so afraid of the worst happening to her and I won't stop trying to get through to her. I know that I don't have epilepsy and I may not be able to fully understand what it is like to have it, but I am not understanding why she is not doing everything that she should be to be healthy & happy. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated!
 
Hi atmywitsend (I feel like that too some times)...

Welcome... you are a very good sister to come here to try to help her.
I came here to find out what I can do for my daughter who is 16. She started having seizures at the same age as your sister. It sounds like your sister doesn't see there is any hope. There is a higher rate of depression surrounding this disorder, plus the FDA just recently raised the risk factor for most all anti-seizure meds and suicidal tendencies.

I know I feel at my wits end when my daughter does not follow the research that I have found that says that diet plays a huge roll in this disorder. There is also a lot of hope with an alternative therapy called neurofeedback. We started a few weeks ago, and we are already seeing some positive results. Especially in the mood area.

Perhaps you can suggest that your sister take a look at this forum and realize that there are quite a few here that are finding control and are leading a fulfilling life.

I know how frustrating it is to watch someone selfdestruct. I believe being there for them is the best thing you can do. Offer love and support, and understanding when she shares. Therapy has been extrememly important to my daughters well being.

Hang in there.
 
Hi AtMyWitsEnd, welcome to the forum. :hello:

Is she seeing a doctor for the depression (separately from the epilepsy)?
 
First, I want to say how great it is that you all come here to talk and get opinions about epilepsy. I have a sister who is 30 years old, she has had it since she was 14. Right now she is down at the hospital in Phila PA being monitored to see if she is a candidate for surgery on the front right temporal lobe of her brain. She has been incredibly depressed for a long time now, she has lost a tremendous amount of weight and I have tried talking to her about how important her health is. She does not exercise, doesn't eat right, drinks soda, does not take vitamins and the worst part of it all, she smokes cigarettes! Have any of you battled depression? Is there anything that I can do for her? I am so afraid of the worst happening to her and I won't stop trying to get through to her. I know that I don't have epilepsy and I may not be able to fully understand what it is like to have it, but I am not understanding why she is not doing everything that she should be to be healthy & happy. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated!
I love your nickname and can relate to that one!

You're a great sister for her. It sounds like you have an excellent grip on where she needs to improve her health habits. It might be a good idea to see if a doctor can obtain a blood level of her epilepsy medication. Some medications that are used for epilepsy are also used to treat depression. Maybe a simple switch in meds would work for her. Or, maybe she's taking a high dosage of a depressant/barbituate that needs to be reduced.

If you could do it, I'd ask to see if she would give you permission to visit her neurologist or physician. With privacy laws, you'd have to obtain that permission (probably in writing). They're really touchy about that stuff.

One thing she may also need to start is calcium supplements. Some epilepsy medications can contribute to osteoporosis. And, vitamin D can help the absorption of the calcium. I personally take chewable calcium supplements (a chocolate fix!).

Personally, for me, epilepsy can be a double challenge to control seizures and to also fit in with everybody else. I usually tell close friends about the epilepsy. The people who mock it are definitely not worth my time. That's the kind of battle we constantly face. I'd love to educate those around me who know little about it without suffering the stigma of being ostracized.

I fight any depressing issues on a constant basis by FAITHFULLY walking my border collie at least 2 miles every night. The exercise helps maintain good bone structure, releases endorphins (that alone fights depression), and gets rid of adrenaline.

This definitely sounds like a potential issue of depression and possible anorexia.

Does she have kids or husband/mate? I'm wondering if she's incredibly lonely. I've known people who get so down after they lose a loved one that they lose a lot of weight.

Also, there are pets who can be extremely therapeutic. My dog is a great companion. She's always by my side. We're mates!

Hopefully, they'll take good care of her in Philly and figure this one out.
 
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Welcome to CWE!:) First, you seem like a great sibling. :) Secondly, sounds like your sister is depressed. Is this depression recent? Some medications cause depression. Of course, maybe she's just sick and tired of having E and being different from everybody else....having a different life than the one she may have dreamed of as a child....It's hard to say. The thing is, hang in there. She's an adult, and she's going to make some decisions that you probably won't agree with. I know....it's frustrating....but try to be patient, and be consistent in encouraging her in any changes that she makes that are healthy changes.
 
Thank you

Thank you for all your replies, you have no idea how much insight you have all given me. I am concerned about the meds and how they effect her. I have suggested to her about talking to someone about her emotions (it seemed to have gone in one ear & out the other like everything else I have to say!) But I do agree that it could be helpful. She does not have a family of her own, there is a boyfriend who is a complete and total loser that has latched on to her. He belittles her and treats her like crap. This is obiviously not helping her feel any better about herself. I think she feels like that's all she can get, she is so down. I will let her know about this message board, talking to all of you has helped me & I believe it could help her. Thank you all so much!
 
To Wits End- Please share this site with your sister! It is amazing what you can learn about meds and just living with E! There is life after diagnosis!!! Some of us go the way of meds, some diet, and some like me take an alternate path. The most important thing is not to wear E like an albatross. If she lacks support from 'friends' then get a dog (preferrably from the shelter) they are non judgemental and some can even sense an episode prior to. I was diagnosed at age 37. It originally hit me like a train and I did not handle it with grace. I have since changed my thinking and now I control my thoughts if not my events. Get up. Get out. Forget the you can'ts and the freaks who don't understand. There are plenty of folks that do understand and are not afraid plus you may just find that there are a lot of people that have been touched by E directly or indirectly and want to share. Good luck to your sister:woot:
 
Is it possible to bring your sister to social outings away from her loser, leeching, control freakin' boyfriend?

She just might find a neutral person who's far nicer, way, way nicer.

I attended an excellent educational seminar this past week. It talks about the baggage we carry around until we can let it go. The lecturer believed in forgiving those who hurt us. If we cannot forgive, we continue to carry emotional baggage, pain and suffering. That seminar was well worth the money I spent. I'll privately send you her link.
 
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End ... Try to think of coming here as a new beginning. The friends you will find here are so supportive. As you have already seen, most are willing to reach out and help even though they have their own struggles.

The depression issue is a tough one that many of us have to deal with at some level. I have never needed outside help, but the depression has came around often. Luckily, I am able to recognize it and try to deal with it myself along with my dear wife. A couple of cute grandkids has helped as well.

I guess my advice would be to help your sister realize she is depressed and see what it is doing to her. She may need professional help in doing so, but the first big step is acknowledging the issue. Just like alcoholism or many other problems, you first have to say, "Yes, I know I am depressed and I want to get better." Also, help her understand that a lot of depression is caused by chemical imbalances from many sources.

Welcome and come visit often!

:cheers:
 
:hello: Wit's End!

Welcome to CWE! There could be multiple
factors in resulting your sister's depression:
as per Bernard's post; or result of medication,
or possibility, is/undergoing/had a seizure and
is poorly controlled. This needs to be brought
up to the Doctor's attention. As for the smoking,
it may or may not contribute to it - she could be
smoking out of frustration (harboring whatever it
might be inside of her), and nicotine does suppress
to a degree, but not sufficient.

There could be possibilities that she could be
taunted, teased, belittled, etc - from the outside
source; and is bottling up inside of her and it's
building up as the days goes by because she does
not know how to release it or had been taught to
be quiet about it, or even worse "Shut Up" (which
is all too common) because people think it's a
negative yadda, yadda, yadda - coming out from
the mouths from a person suffering from Epilepsy,
so without anyone to turn to, this is the result of
what happens, it gets bottled up - then resent-
ment builds up, then anger, then hostility, rebellion,
and so on. The earlier it is dealt with in the proper
manner - the better the chances are.

But that which I have posted above is merely only
one avenue that is all too common place, as there's
far more other areas as well - for there are people
with Epilepsy who can also have mental disorders
as well. I could go on and on and on. I am not a
Medical Doctor, only the Doctor can sit down and
have a heart-to-heart talk with your sister and
cover the whole ball park; and hopefully - turn
things around and together you and your sister can
then be back in tune again!

However, don't try to do this on your own though,
but rather, let the Doctor sort it all out!

:)
 
An Update On My Sis

Thank you all for the wonderful advice to my last post about my sister! And now for the update....I have been running down to Thomas Jefferson University Hospital in Philadelphia all week to show my support for my sister. She has been in the NICUnit undergoing testing for her seisures to see if she is a candidate for surgery. And she was overmedicated(Topamax, Nuerontin&Depacoat) before so now they are fixing that too! She has had some pretty big seisures this week, great for the tests but my sister is wiped out!!!The Dr has weaned her off of the Topamax(fondly referred to as Dopamax) and is starting her on Keppra. She is also done with the Depacoat. Yesterday she was in better spirits, best I have seen her in awhile. She ate more than a bird size portion of food. She has had the absolute best care at that hospital hands down! I think that the staff has been so positive about everything she can't help but feel more positive about her situation. It has been a roller coaster of emotions for me this week, I am so happy that she has had this experience because I really think she needed to have it! I have told her about this site and how it helped me get through this week of waiting to see what happens. Thank God for this site & all of you!
 
I'm glad your sister is doing better. That's good news! I will keep my fingers crossed for her continued improvement. She's lucky to have such a good sister.

Lynn
:sheep:
 
Cool !

I'm really touched by her progress and happy for both of you. I hope things continue to get better. It sounds like she's in great care!
 
Great news! I am glad that she found someone competent to help her out of the trenches.
 
... she was overmedicated(Topamax, Nuerontin&Depacoat) ... The Dr has weaned her off of the Topamax(fondly referred to as Dopamax) and is starting her on Keppra. She is also done with the Depacoat. Yesterday she was in better spirits, best I have seen her in awhile. ...

That's great news. Sounds like the depression might have been related to either the Topamax or Depakote (Depakote had that effect on Stacy).

Hopefully Keppra will work out better for her, but Keppra is also infamous for causing extreme moodiness as a side effect. Taking vitamin B6 supplements is reported to help curb that side effect.
 
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