How much do you remember about your seizures? or know they've happened (partial)?

[albie187]

I still don't have any diagnosis and as far as I'm aware I've only had 2 seizures (if that's what they were). I have no memory and was only aware something was amiss because the first time I burnt my hands and the second time I was at a cash machine and my card went missing (I thought the machine must have swallowed it but found it a few minutes later in my purse which was in my bag). I don't seem to have headaches or anything after, or any warning before. And the only things I am aware of is missing around 30seconds and feeling a bit confused or disorientated.

Often I'm wondering if I have really only had two, or if it's possible I'm having them regularly without knowing.

Does anyone else have this type of experience or do you all know when you've had a seizure? Did it take you time to recognise certain things as seizures? Or is it just likely that I have only had 2 and I'd know if I'd had more.

I am alone most of the time by the way, hence problems diagnosing. I'm a MA student but only have 3-4 contact hours a week (and for the past month I've had none), and, I work around 25 hours a week but about half of that is spent standing in a shop when no one else is there. The rest of my time is largely spent alone in my room reading and studying.

 

[Mommy_BLCSPC]

When I was a child, I had the same type of things I had to deal with. No one realized they were a form of Epilepsy. They all thought I was a space cadet. lol It wasn't until after I had my oldest son that the seizures got bad enough for me to realize there was something wrong. I would see a neurologist and have an EEG done to find out for sure.

 

[Maisy]

The only memory I got is my diary when I read what people have written except one time was walking out the co op spaced out smashed straight into the doors

 

[kostareyna]

Mine are myoclonic seizures so I experience everysingle one, I would say that the worst thing is the fear that comes right before the jerk.

 

[albie187]

Thanks for the replies.

Mommy_BLCSPS I am seeing a neurologist and undergoing tests at the minute. My EEG is on Friday but the neurologist said they only show things 50% of the time so I'll probably need a sleep-deprived EEG after that too.

Maisy, even though you have no memory of them, are you aware that you've had one?

I'm just concerned I'm having them and I'm not even aware of it.

 

[petero]

all of mine have been tonic-clonic (that I know of) - and I don't usually remember a thing except gradually realizing someone is looking right into my face (a doctor or paramedic or family or) or that I can barely move but need to pee, or that I wake up in blood, vomit, urine, or some combination but that my brain is still trapped on the outskirts of a black hole somewhere...

if I can recall with some modicum of accuracy-
there seems to be an order, a tendency:
1. Going about my normal day - yadda yadda yadda... then
2. I don't 'realize' or remember anything,
3. I start to realize something is not right,
4. I start to make sense of vision - and then usually start to realize there's a face directly in my field of vision
5. I want to know what the f**k just happened to me (or what did THEY do to me?)
6. I start making sense of the person asking me "the questions" or saying "hi you had a seizure - just relax" type of stuff
7. I try to get up and be "normal"
8. I realize I have no brain-to-muscular control, or brain-to-sense control
9. (I want to answer the questions right! I'm smart! I'm normal! Why can't I move? I know I should be able to answer these questions! Why doesn't my brain 'connect' to my body anymore?),
10. then I start to "get it" around this point and just think "fuck - here we go again";
11. Then I start to feel the shame- about being the center of a big "issue" now, about being such a fool, about being a failure, yadda yadda - whee!
12. it's around this time I want to forget entirely about the entire thing, I want to forget entirely about my life, I want to go home, I want to stop existing, I need to stop thinking because of the amount of exertion to do anything,
13. and by then if it's a seizure involving the medical world I try to go back to sleep.

For some reason the ambulance FAN(?) is a prominent memory - to ambulances have fans? not like a ceiling or floor fan, but like the sound of a large computer cooling fan, and the beeps

 

[BrandiBrat]

I vaguely remember some and then there are others with no memory at all. The ones with no memory are the ones where I leave myself "presents". They are usually things like shoes in the freezer, forks in the trash, laptop in the fridge, or garden gloves on my night stand.

 

[Sandie]

Sometimes I become aware in the middle of doing things. Yesterday I found myself trying to stuff a bag of garbage into the mailbox. Freaky. Like Brandi, I throw spoons in the trash but sometimes I become aware and sometimes I just find them there (sometimes I don't) Hence my dwindling supply. I must say I have never put my laptop in the fridge. That is pretty original (ha ha). I get absence seizures which only last for up to about 60 seconds and most of the time I have olfactory hallucinations and I slur/burble my words. When I am in 'seizure mode', I also can't type properly. Dyslexic fingers. When I was first diagnosed I wasn't aware that I was having absence seizures. Just thought I was going mad. I was quite shocked when my neurologist diagnosed me with epilepsy because the type I have did not fit my description of what epilepsy is.

 

[mary1]

I've been diagnosed with Complex Partial Seizures, and most of the time I can feel the seizure going on but can't do anything about it, can remember it after I have had it, and rarely, don't know when I have one. I live alone so I have no idea. I've had it at the checkout counter at the Grocery Store, and it is so frustrating when I lose awareness and the cashier looks at me in disbelief; I take the bus and had one just as my bus stop was approaching and missed it; I walked my daughter's dog and wondered where I was for about two minutes. These are examples of my seizures, to see if they are like yours. I wear a cross all of the time and I just depend on God to keep me out of danger.

 

[car05161967]

I don't remember the details of every single seizure I have had my whole life(I will be 46 on the 16th). But I don't think, I have ever lost consciousness, if that is what you are referring to.

 

[albie187]

Thanks for the replies everyone. It's interesting to hear everyone's experiences, and the diversity even within complex partials.

 

[knothing]

I remember 2 seconds before. I wake and I am alert then fall back asleep with no memory of it then I wake again and finally am with the world again. After that I am lucky to remember much of the next 3 days.