.... but it seems like perhaps I need to be.... can't read too much right now.... need to stop with the tears as they upset hubby.
I am so frustrated with whatever the heck is going on with my body. I have been having problems for more than 2 years. It started with episodes of what seemed more like fainting than seizures - usually related to coughing.
Sometimes I don't actually fall - but not always. I almost always lose all bladder control.
I used to have no sense that it was about to happen; just wake up on the floor, often in a pool of blood with no idea how I got there. I don't injure myself as much now - we redid all the flooring in the house, so I no longer get carpet burns, although I am still very hard on my glasses and my poor ol' face.
My doctor did - after about a year of me complaining - send me for a few tests. Two showed abnormalities - one related to liver function, and the other was the Holter monitor, which showed irregularities in my heartbeat - but since those were not at the time of my fainting episode, he decided they were not significant.
He decided none of it was anything to worry about - said it was "cough syncope" and I should just not do it while on stairs or while driving.
I tried to listen, honest - but in November, I was driving to school one day and woke up just in time to see the tree. I broke one arm, sprained the other, lost my drivers' license - tons of fun stuff.
Finally the doc decided to care; he dithered a bit between sending me to an internist or a neurologist - but eventually chose the internist; my appointment is scheduled for April.
I have continued to FDGB (fall down go boom), of course.... very irregular; I can go weeks without a problem, then have as many as 8 - 10 episodes in a day.
They have also undergone significant changes lately. Over the last 2 weeks or so, I seem to be no longer just OUT. During some of them, I am semi-aware - can see my arms flailing around but can't make them STOP or anything.
Had one in class today. Mortifying. I am the teacher - was sitting on a desk at the front of the class when it happened - was still there - semi-aware, although I couldn't hear anything over the rushing of blood in my head. Took longer than usual to get back to functional and figure out what I was supposed to be saying/doing after; was totally cofused and out of it. The only positive bit was that somehow I did not lose bladder control and embarass myself even more, but it seems like it is only a matter of time.
I am a full time student and teach - have only been able to continue because my husband is amazing; he drives me everywhere and hangs around outside my classes in case I need him.
But starting in April, he goes back to work full time, and won't be able to do that. He will still drive me wherever - but will be on my own until he can come back for me.
Honestly, when it happened today in class it seemed like the last straw. I was tempted to just quit. Quit teaching, quit school... just quit going out of the house entirely.
I'm trying to get past that.... but honestly, I don't know how much longer I can DO this.
Anyway.... this is way too long; I'm sorry...I'll shut up now.
I am so frustrated with whatever the heck is going on with my body. I have been having problems for more than 2 years. It started with episodes of what seemed more like fainting than seizures - usually related to coughing.
Sometimes I don't actually fall - but not always. I almost always lose all bladder control.
I used to have no sense that it was about to happen; just wake up on the floor, often in a pool of blood with no idea how I got there. I don't injure myself as much now - we redid all the flooring in the house, so I no longer get carpet burns, although I am still very hard on my glasses and my poor ol' face.
My doctor did - after about a year of me complaining - send me for a few tests. Two showed abnormalities - one related to liver function, and the other was the Holter monitor, which showed irregularities in my heartbeat - but since those were not at the time of my fainting episode, he decided they were not significant.
He decided none of it was anything to worry about - said it was "cough syncope" and I should just not do it while on stairs or while driving.
I tried to listen, honest - but in November, I was driving to school one day and woke up just in time to see the tree. I broke one arm, sprained the other, lost my drivers' license - tons of fun stuff.
Finally the doc decided to care; he dithered a bit between sending me to an internist or a neurologist - but eventually chose the internist; my appointment is scheduled for April.
I have continued to FDGB (fall down go boom), of course.... very irregular; I can go weeks without a problem, then have as many as 8 - 10 episodes in a day.
They have also undergone significant changes lately. Over the last 2 weeks or so, I seem to be no longer just OUT. During some of them, I am semi-aware - can see my arms flailing around but can't make them STOP or anything.
Had one in class today. Mortifying. I am the teacher - was sitting on a desk at the front of the class when it happened - was still there - semi-aware, although I couldn't hear anything over the rushing of blood in my head. Took longer than usual to get back to functional and figure out what I was supposed to be saying/doing after; was totally cofused and out of it. The only positive bit was that somehow I did not lose bladder control and embarass myself even more, but it seems like it is only a matter of time.
I am a full time student and teach - have only been able to continue because my husband is amazing; he drives me everywhere and hangs around outside my classes in case I need him.
But starting in April, he goes back to work full time, and won't be able to do that. He will still drive me wherever - but will be on my own until he can come back for me.
Honestly, when it happened today in class it seemed like the last straw. I was tempted to just quit. Quit teaching, quit school... just quit going out of the house entirely.
I'm trying to get past that.... but honestly, I don't know how much longer I can DO this.
Anyway.... this is way too long; I'm sorry...I'll shut up now.