As my introduction post, (hello everyone).
I will lay out the vastness of my stupidity.
I am a 34 year old woman and I started having grand mal sezuires new years day 2003.
I fought it hard, I refused to take meds or change my lifestyle so as you can imagine my sezuires got progressively worse.
There were two things that guaranteed me a sezuire (not everytime but when I had a sezuire usually one but more often both where involved), alcohol and tiredness.
That all changed about 6 years ago, I started having back to back sezuires, I ended up on hospital being told off by a very disbelieving doctor that I had gone for years unmedicated.
He put me on a low level of topirmate (because of my weight apparently).
After this I had one sezuire, they up the meds and I have been sezuire free since.
I changed meds about 3 years ago and now on keppra because of topimax side effects.
So why am I stupid?
One of the changes I made as well as going on meds was to cut out booze almost entirely for about 2 years, then I started having small amounts. Small = 1 or 2 glasses of wine.
It was all going great, I could have a few drinks and not affect my sezuire threshold.
I also suffered from major anxiety and panic, alcohol was really rubbish for that too so I mostly steered clear.
I worked through my anxiety stuff, and suddenly drinking wasn't so much of an issue, I had been sezuire free for 4 or so years and I was finally letting myself believe that I could be sezuire free (dare I hope permanently).
I finally let go of some of the fear.
With this came a renewed interest in my social life and this has involved alcohol. My one to two small ones became 2-4 large wines, I was now drinking a fair amount and regularly at least once a week.
Then I moved in with my new house mate and my alcohol consumption has gone through the roof, my current poison in rum and last night I drank a little over half a bottle by myself, I would say that is the most alcohol I have had since I cleaned up my act and I am lying here in bed cursing my foolishness.
I don't know why on earth I would risk being sezuire free, like that.
I was having fun, and was in someone's house so free pouring rather than measured shots, so I guess it is easy done but I am feeling pretty stupid and more than a little bit worried.
With the too much booze comes the lack of sleep, waking up early because of hangover.
So now I am on here basically waiting to see if I have a sezuire and deciding on whether I need to vow to stick too 1 or 2 or stop drinking all together as it isn't worth it.
I will lay out the vastness of my stupidity.
I am a 34 year old woman and I started having grand mal sezuires new years day 2003.
I fought it hard, I refused to take meds or change my lifestyle so as you can imagine my sezuires got progressively worse.
There were two things that guaranteed me a sezuire (not everytime but when I had a sezuire usually one but more often both where involved), alcohol and tiredness.
That all changed about 6 years ago, I started having back to back sezuires, I ended up on hospital being told off by a very disbelieving doctor that I had gone for years unmedicated.
He put me on a low level of topirmate (because of my weight apparently).
After this I had one sezuire, they up the meds and I have been sezuire free since.
I changed meds about 3 years ago and now on keppra because of topimax side effects.
So why am I stupid?
One of the changes I made as well as going on meds was to cut out booze almost entirely for about 2 years, then I started having small amounts. Small = 1 or 2 glasses of wine.
It was all going great, I could have a few drinks and not affect my sezuire threshold.
I also suffered from major anxiety and panic, alcohol was really rubbish for that too so I mostly steered clear.
I worked through my anxiety stuff, and suddenly drinking wasn't so much of an issue, I had been sezuire free for 4 or so years and I was finally letting myself believe that I could be sezuire free (dare I hope permanently).
I finally let go of some of the fear.
With this came a renewed interest in my social life and this has involved alcohol. My one to two small ones became 2-4 large wines, I was now drinking a fair amount and regularly at least once a week.
Then I moved in with my new house mate and my alcohol consumption has gone through the roof, my current poison in rum and last night I drank a little over half a bottle by myself, I would say that is the most alcohol I have had since I cleaned up my act and I am lying here in bed cursing my foolishness.
I don't know why on earth I would risk being sezuire free, like that.
I was having fun, and was in someone's house so free pouring rather than measured shots, so I guess it is easy done but I am feeling pretty stupid and more than a little bit worried.
With the too much booze comes the lack of sleep, waking up early because of hangover.
So now I am on here basically waiting to see if I have a sezuire and deciding on whether I need to vow to stick too 1 or 2 or stop drinking all together as it isn't worth it.
