I joined this group intending to whine and cry and rant and rave about how much I hate doctors, medications, and epilepsy after having a major meltdown this weekend. While exploring the site, however, I ran across the "You know you have epilepsy when..." thread and laughed my blues away. Thank you to all of you who posted there (I will add my own "You know whens..." once I introduce myself).
I was diagnosed with adult on-set epilepsy twenty-four years ago, though I suspect I had it longer. Like others, I too was a guinea pig as far as finding a medication that actually worked. I won't go into my horror stories about all the meds I tried; suffice to say that the only ones I found tolerable were Phenobarital when I was first diagnosed (I was on that for fifteen years) and now Lamotrigine, which I have been on for the last six years. I occasionally have breakthrough seizures, but I don't want to tell my doctor because I really don't want to try another adjunct medication.
I developed severe insomnia after starting the Lamotrigine (duh...I was taken off a barbiturate and put on a stimulant). My neurologist told me my problem was "mental" and he sent me to a shrink. I have now gone from Ambien to Ativan to Restoril. Each time I stop one of the sleep meds my doctors have a fit and put me on another because they are afraid I will have seizures if I stop the meds abruptly. So it's a vicious circle, from one med to another to another, and I am getting so frustrated with it all. I just want to be off them all!
The reason for my meltdown this weekend is my memory impairment that seems to get worse and worse as time progresses. My long-term memory seems non-existant - I hardly remember my childhood - and now my short-term memory is really going fast. I'm just curious as to how many of you have serve memory impairment and if this is caused by the medications (I know the Ativan really messed me up) or epilepsy or a combination of both?
Well, this introduction turned out to be much longer than I intended. Thanks to all of you who made it this far.
I was diagnosed with adult on-set epilepsy twenty-four years ago, though I suspect I had it longer. Like others, I too was a guinea pig as far as finding a medication that actually worked. I won't go into my horror stories about all the meds I tried; suffice to say that the only ones I found tolerable were Phenobarital when I was first diagnosed (I was on that for fifteen years) and now Lamotrigine, which I have been on for the last six years. I occasionally have breakthrough seizures, but I don't want to tell my doctor because I really don't want to try another adjunct medication.
I developed severe insomnia after starting the Lamotrigine (duh...I was taken off a barbiturate and put on a stimulant). My neurologist told me my problem was "mental" and he sent me to a shrink. I have now gone from Ambien to Ativan to Restoril. Each time I stop one of the sleep meds my doctors have a fit and put me on another because they are afraid I will have seizures if I stop the meds abruptly. So it's a vicious circle, from one med to another to another, and I am getting so frustrated with it all. I just want to be off them all!
The reason for my meltdown this weekend is my memory impairment that seems to get worse and worse as time progresses. My long-term memory seems non-existant - I hardly remember my childhood - and now my short-term memory is really going fast. I'm just curious as to how many of you have serve memory impairment and if this is caused by the medications (I know the Ativan really messed me up) or epilepsy or a combination of both?
Well, this introduction turned out to be much longer than I intended. Thanks to all of you who made it this far.
When I came to my senses I said, "I'm seizing again, right?"