So nobody likes me, I will be alone forever?

[niceguyVZ]

NObody likes me except granmas and old women who are nice and see me as their son cause i'm nice.

im nice and quiet and girls around my age (30s)or 20s or whatever, they are never ever interested in me. Yeah some are nice and say hi to me . But not into anything that will turn into a couple (GF/BF/date). The only reason the ones that have talked to me talk to me is cause i belong to a support group place and i'm like a patient and they are there to help out so they have to talk and be nice to the people.

I feel I will be alone forever. I thought women liked nice guys but apparently they don't. Maybe they don't like me cause i'm not good at speaking and i'm not mature or anything and i'm disabled so i never fit in in their conversations cause i speak slow and not mature conversations.

That sucks.
I mean i'm in my 30s, and i have body problems I may die sooner than 40s. So i don't have enough time. So it's pretty much over.

And it's not even just BF/GF, nobody even wants me as a friend.

The other day i saw a typical Ambitious COllege grad Girl in her like 20s. a Guy around the same came sat next to her. They didn't know eachother. And immediately they started converstaion and became friends. I heard how they were speaking and that they connected cause similar. They both had jobs, they both had career aspirations and stuff. and they both spoke fluently and lot of things. Cause that's typically what guys that age do, they have lives and jobs. And women too.

Now me, disabled no job , no aspiration nnot ambitious. Women like that would never like me. And then i can't speak so they lose interest easy. Anyways, i hate mylife.

 

[Penny]

hmm. I'm beginning to wonder.

 

[Dolores]

Anyways, i hate mylife.

Niceguy (and I'm sure you are) - First you need to try to accept your life, then you need to try to focus on the moments in it that you like, then you must try to learn to love yourself. I know that sounds like a bunch of platitudes but I say them because I've been there. Not your hell but my own personal hell. I let my mind, my negative thinking destroy me and those I loved most. A big part of me was screaming "why me" but I was lucky that a very small voice kept telling me to focus on "the now". This moment is all we ever really have. And it is so short it is gone in an instant. But it's the only time I have to do anything that really matters, anything that can really get me out of the morass I am in. So each moment I try to do exactly what I'm supposed to do. I call it "doing the right thing". Only you know what is the right thing to do in any of your given moment. The past does not matter - it is past. The future does not matter - it may not come. All you have is now. That's all any of us has.

Maybe the right thing for you to do tonight was to come to CWE and scream out your pain. That can be so cathartic and can help you understand all your angsts. Only when you name them can you deal with them. And you have been doing that.

I don't have any expectations of the future - neither good nor bad. If you do that you set yourself up to fail. In my life the good things haven't come with a sign on them saying "look here, good thing coming". I've had to allow them to enter my life and I've had to learn how to embrace them.

Nothing is obvious. You are probably (and this comes from my own experience) missing out on wonderful experiences because of your mind set - she won't like me, I'm not good enough, no one likes me.

Just do the right thing.

 

[niceguyVZ]

Thanks. So i just have to concentrate on my hobbies and just not care about nothing?
Then how come all the other people have female friends and girlfriends and dates easily. Even if it never turns into nothing but they have dates.

I guess that's all i can do. Do my hobbies at home. Well i've been doing that all the time. And it gets boring all lonely and i dont have anyone to show or share my hobbies with. Meanwhile all the playboys in schools and foreigners in English classes in America are all getting Female friends or GF easily. and those girls love those guys.
Even in Highschools, all the girls have friends or dates easily. i see it all the time cause i live by a highschool.

 

[arnie]

niceguy, this is a great board for in-depth epilepsy discussion and general emotional support, but if you are serious about getting your romantic and social life turned around there is a much more appropriate discussion board, which I have put a link to below. If you are really serious about making changes in those areas of your life I encourage you to get involved there and use this board for issues related to epilepsy.
You can do it! Go for it!

http://www.nomoremrniceguy.com/forums/