All,
I so understand. Seizures can be so scary. And we all tend to attach our own meanings to them. I know I did. There are some alternative, research-based explanations that might help to understand them in a different way.
Losing sight, hearing can be a seizure, or it can just be passing out. Losing senses can be part of the passing out process. If you have witnesses seeing you seize during one of the loss of senses events, it's pretty plain that it's a seizure.
A feeling of imploding or falling down a hole can be a simple partial seizure leading to a generalized seizure. Take a look at Alice in Wonderland Syndrome.
http://www.epilepsyontario.org/clie...dly/Alice+in+Wonderland+Syndrome?OpenDocument
http://www.aliceinwonderlandsyndrome.net/Alice-in-Wonderland-Syndrome-Symptoms.html
Having strange visions, feeling weird body sensations, spiritual experiences, hearing voices, etc. can be ictal, preictal, or postictal psychosis, Alice in Wonderland Syndrome, or just another effect of the seizures. Especially if your seizures start in the temporal lobe. Fear seizures are the worst, and most often come from the amygdala. It feels like a deer in headlights, or how you'd feel if you jumped off a building and you're half way down. Thank goodness it lasts under 5 minutes. Mine last under 3, most often under 1. I'm totally wiped out afterwards and sleep for a couple of hours. Operant conditioning - it makes me afraid of many things whether I'm seizing or not. Mostly things that were around me or that I was thinking of just before a fear seizure, and sometimes afraid of multiple things I didn't realize were around me until it happened again. For those that have this kind of seizure, this could also be part of why you are afraid all the time.
Psychosis - Seizure-related psychosis can happen in 6% to 10% of patients with intractable (uncontrolled) epilepsy. Take a look at this thread. It'a talking about a feeling of mind control, but it would apply equally to seeing something that isn't there, like people moving furniture out, a feeling of other-worldly, hearing and seeing things, not hearing and seeing things, seeing them wrong, etc.
http://www.coping-with-epilepsy.com...-has-experienced-type-thing-14273/#post147072
I don't know how many of you have temporal lobe epilepsy, or have generalized epilepsy that starts in the temporal lobe. Religious experiences (good or bad) are also part of temporal lobe seizures.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/18171635
For better or worse, these are other explanations. I don't know about you, but the more my logical mind understands the research findings around epilepsy and its effects, the less scared I feel about it all.
Adding more links. Interesting reading on the topic of seizures and fear or other emotions or experiences. Look in the upper right-hand corner of the abstract (summary) page for a link to the whole text of the study. Some resources to see the whole article have free membership and access, others don't. Abstracts are free. Often I find seeing the abstract is enough.
Phenomenology of hallucinations, illusions, and delusions as part of seizure semiology
Fear as the only clinical expression of affective focal status epilepticus
Interictal emotional state and epilepsy.
Psychosis with frontal lobe epilepsy responds to carbamazepine
Which clinical and experimental data link temporal lobe epilepsy with depression?
Ictal symptoms of anxiety, avoidance behaviour, and dissociation in patients with dissociative seizures
Evaluation of a behaviour analysis and treatment of progressive myoclonus epilepsy, type Unverricht-Lundborg: a case study
Acute alteration of emotional behaviour in epileptic seizures is related to transient desynchrony in emotion-regulation networks
Extinction deficit and fear reinstatement after electrical stimulation of the amygdala: implications for kindling-associated fear and anxiety.
Neuropsychiatric and memory issues in epilepsy (free full text)
Recurrent attacks of fear and visual hallucinations in a child
There's more but I'm getting a really bad headache so if you want more info go to
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/ and do a searhc. it's the NIH publications data base.
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