im really depressed

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vapour

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hey all. had issues posting something last night (not sure if it posted) but here I am again.

Im struggling with the Epilepsy and Bipolar diagnosis very much. I know Ive gone over this in another post.

Its got to the point where I reallythink im very depressed.Not because of Bipolar but because I have refractory epilepsy.

my psychiatrist told me that I have to let my Neurologist know that most days I suffer with tingling and twitching. Personally I dont see the point ? If I complained about every bit of nausea and tingling and twitching Id be here all day...I have sort of given up in a way. Tried 3 seizure medications...on 2 at the moment (tegretol and lamictal)

THe seizure medicines really have worked.. its just that its not got it 100% under control and I am having to limit myself on a daily basis...and put up with residue symptoms.

I had a traumatic year last year leading up to the diagnosis... not knowing what the hell was wrong with me...ending up at the ER and now things have died down I just keep repeating it all in my head.

My mom has been calling me, and Im so glad..but each time I just ball down crying she is trying to be as supportive as she can be from a long distance and I just wish she was here in person cause I really need a hug right now. I think I must cry about 4 hours a day roughly.

I dont know how to go about telling my Neurologist the rest of the symptoms and how to go about talking with my psychiatrist about the depression ?

See, they dont understand, and they cant cure. Maybe I can go down alternative ways to deal with epilepsy like VNS...but in the end.. I still have epilepsy and I still have Bipolar disorder. Im sorry for complaining so much, but its torn apart my life... and Im just not dealing so well with that.
 
Sorry to hear how depressed you are. I wish that I could help you there.

As far as telling your neurologist what you need to, you've told us your symptoms without whining. Would copying & pasting from the site what you've told us to a word program & printing it out & taking it to him so you can either read your symptoms or just show him the paper help?
 
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I agree with epileric,

You did a great job in your posting. I understood your symptoms and what you want to be done. Hold down "control P" and it will print, if you are connected to a printer. Take that in to your doctor and I think it may make things easier.

Here's a hug. It's virtual, but here it is. <<<hug>>>
 
Remember that a diagnosis is just a word....you are the same person you were before you were given a certain 'label'.
I am going through similar process myself....since January, I have been dx with pernicious anemia, multiple sclerosis and epilepsy. Now that is a whole lot, but I can only live one day at a time and I want to live life to the fullest, so I am determined not to allow a 'label' or 'diagnosis' to decide how or what I am able to do. It is your life....don't allow a 'word' to bring you down.

Your neuro needs to know how you are feeling so if a medication needs to be adjusted or not.
I am sending you a <hug> and wishing you the best....May God Bless You. :)
 
Dealing with epilepsy alone is SO HARD. I was diagnosed about a year ago and I am still having a hard time. I'd be better if my seizures were somewhat under control but they aren't. Cheer up-spend time on this website and you will hopefully feel better.
 
Vapour,

I, too, have struggled with refractory epilepsy and Bipolar issues for years.

My seizures weren't under control and nearly 20 years ago I had a Left Temporal Lobectomy and was seizure free for only 14 months. And that is when all hell broke loose for me! The seizures returned with vengeance and depression set in. My epileptologist tried me on numerous drugs as did my neuropsychiatrist, who later said I was bipolar, all to no avail. In 1997 I had the VNS and it has helped with the seizures, not completely stopped them, tho.

As others have suggested, can you show your doctors what you posted here? Everyone needs to be on the same page. That's the only way they'll be able to help you.

I would say "cheer up" but I know that usually isn't the right thing to say to a person with bipolar issues, at least it didn't work for me when I was in a depressed state of mind.

{{{HUGS}}}
 
Hugs go out top you! You are still the same person that you have always been and you are a great person! Don't let labels define you. I have a mental illness and Epilepsy and I am still a good Friend, Father and Husband. We are all here for you and I am sorry for your struggles but thankful that you are sharing with us so we can share our compassion with you.

You are in my thoughts and prayers,

John
 
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