15 months since last full TC... yay...

[AndrewIrish]

Was just thinking... beyond a big scare that happened a few months ago, I'm now 15 months removed from my last full-on Tonic Clonic... the 'jerks' are still there and I have associated problems... but as far as a tonic clonic... this is one of the longest stretches of time I've gone without one since I started having them at age 19... I'm 26 now.... hmmm... maybe never another?

Also, I know this is morbid... but it's like... having never gotten properly diagnosed or properly treated... I feel almost sad... like as if something is unresolved.... I dunno... I almost wish I had another one to re-affirm to myself that yes, I went through it and yes it was a serious problem so people would take my 'jerks' and migraines more seriously but... I dunno... the longesr I go without a TC the more I feel like someone who is 'twitchy', who has myoclonic jerks in conversations with people and they look at me funny and almost fearful because of them... I dunno... wish I had a 'rubber stamp' easy excuse, to hand out like a ticket to someone with certainty and say, 'Here, yes this sucks, yes it's real and it's a problem for me...'

I don't know what the heck I'm talking about.

I think as carnally as it is... I almost 'miss' the TC's... does that make ANY kind of sense? I know it's a 'wanna be a victim' card, that I feel as if I get more sympathy from friends and family when I have a TC then every day I love with the other symptoms... the wife, the mum... the whole family is so kind and supportive to me after a TC... I dunno... I guess that's what I miss... don't miss the tongue-biting at all... just... I guess it's an easy way to get a quick surge of empathy from those around me...

 

[BrandiBrat]

Congrats on the 15 months!! What do you think is working for you? The meds? Lifestyle changes? Please share...

The need for love, empathy, and attention is a human response and natural desire. It doesn't make you a victim, it just makes you human.

 

[Chaz1]

Im with BrandiBrat, we are all mere humans, longing for well many things this tough world does not always give us easily...

but, dont long too much for them to return.....

congratulations on the T/C freedom, long may it continue..

 

[gowings83]

Very big congrats on the 15 months I'm working on month 7 without t/c seizures, although I'm still having little "spaced out" feeling and jerking. I too have the want of well family/friend sympathy some days, but also to not be treated or seen any differently, not be judged. There's days where I'm just so depressed thinking why the heck did this happen to me and some days of just thinking who the heck cares. Yeah my brain is everywhere, just saying it's all normal to have different feelings about it all, anything period really.

 

[Sparkles]

Congratulations on 15 months! It is hard to have things unresolved and there is definitely a need to know why, I think. And I also think people are more understanding of TC as eplipsy and seizures as opposed to other types. Revel in being "free" of TC for now if you can. Cheers!

 

[Nakamova]

Supercongrats Andrew! Keep the tonic-free train rolling...

 

[AndrewIrish]

Thanks amigos...

 

[Princess]

That gives me hope Andrew! Congrats!