Blonde Jokes....

[TeeTees]

A blonde wanted to sell her car, but couldn't find any buyers. She called her friend for advice, and her friend asked her how many miles she had on her car.
"235,000 miles." Her friend told her that was the problem. But the blonde's friend told her that her brother is a mechanic and could put back the miles to whatever she wanted. So the blonde went to the mechanic and told him to put the miles at 40,000. Two days later the blond's friend asked her if she sold the car since her brother dropped the miles. The blonde told her, "Why would I sell the car? There are only 40,000 miles on it!"

Two bored casino dealers were waiting at the craps tables for players when a gorgeous blonde lady walked in and asked if they minded if she bet twenty thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice. She said, ''I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely naked.'' With that, she stripped off all her clothes and then rolled the dice while yelling ''Come on baby, momma needs new clothes!'' She then jumped up and down, hugging each of the casino dealers while yelling ''YES, I WIN! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT, I WIN!!'' With that, she picked up her winnings and clothes and quickly left.
The dealers stood there staring at each other dumbfounded, until one finally asked the other, ''What the hell did she roll anyway?'' The second dealer answered, ''I thought you were paying attention!''

How do you confuse a blonde?
Tell her to count the stairs on a escalator.

Q: Why did the blonde sell her television?
A: To buy a VCR!

There were 11 blondes and one brunette on a rope climbing up a mountain. They had nothing to hold them to the rope. The rope began slipping and breaking.The brunette said, ''Girls, I'm going to let go of the rope, since it can't hold all of us. Your lives are more important to me. There are also many more of you..." and she made a big speech about how special they were. At the end, all of the blondes started clapping.

What do you call a blond with TWO brain cells?.....

...''PREGNANT''

Did you hear about the blonde who tried to kill herself?
She jumped out a basement window!

 

[Rae1889]

how do you confuse a blond?
put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner.

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A blonde walks into an appliance and electronics store. She walks around before finally seeing an amazing microwave, but it was on a high shelf. So she asked one of the sales associates if they would mind pulling the microwave off the shelf for her.

The salesman looked at her and said "I'm sorry but we dont sell to dumb blondes" and with that, the lady got mad. So mad she screamed she would never come back and stomped out.

She sat at home, and all she kept thinking about was that amazing microwave. It was big enough to cook a turkey! So she went and bought a bottle of red hair dye at the drug store, dyed her hair and went back. She found a new salesman and asked for his assistance in taking down the microwave. The salesman laughed

"Im sorry but we dont sell to dumb blondes." Again, the blonde, fuming, left the store in outrage.

She decided she would give it one last shot, and stopped at the drug store to buy some black hair dye. One last time, she walked into the store, found a saleswoman and asked to get the microwave from the shelf. But she was only answered with a giggle. "I'm sorry miss, we dont sell to dumb blondes." The blonde looked the woman dead in the eyes, red in the face form anger.

"How come you all keep saying that! I went through all this trouble to dye my hair TWICE and your still able to tell i'm blonde! WHY???!!?"

The saleswoman looked at the blonde and politely said. "miss, thats because its a TV, not a microwave."

 

[Nakamova]

How do you know a blond has been using your computer?
White-out on the monitor.