Neuro Picker
New
- Messages
- 2
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 0
This is a situation I’d like to share it with you all in case you’re unlucky enough to have experienced it or something similar. Unfortunately it relates to disability discrimination, something I thought I would never experience!
The situation
I have been ill for the past few months following the brave decision to come down off my Anti Epileptic Medication’s Keppra and Zonegran. Previous to this, I made sure that I’d found somewhere comfortable to live with good a fresh set of friends and kind people. During my withdrawal from my AED’s, my seizure’s increased, my speech reduced due to lack of mental cognition, my confidence dropped and I became a hermit to my own room. To avoid this feeling of aloneness and shame I sought some comfort in my flatmates, I didn’t want them to consider me as a recluse or different person. Previous to this, I had many friends, played rugby, competed in Strongman competitions, held a senior position in a local special needs school – so I was very faithful I’d recover to my normal self. Upon mentioning my epilepsy and it’s actual nature to my flatmates, two of them became more distant and they began to avoid me. During this time, my work decided to consider ending my contract – this also added to my stress levels and of course more seizures. I did have some other friends, and thankfully a very supportive girlfriend – I am still forever grateful for her support throughout these tough times.
My recovery
I recovered. I found biofeedback and it worked for me. My medication levels are at a very low level now and I use some new acquired skills and I’m currently having an absence once every week – if that. I have my job back and I begin teaching again in September. This is awesome to know, I thought, as I had July and August to recover to full strength and chill. I thought I’d covered everything. My flatmates knew about my epilepsy, my friends knew and I had my job back. Awesome…I thought I could relax.
The Shocker
Yesterday morning, I receive a text message on my mobile phone from my house mate:
“As you know, your 6 month contract runs out at the end of August and unfortunately we won’t be renewing it…sorry for any inconvenience this may cause”.
There are four of us in the house, I was the only one to receive this ‘text message’. I have never fallen out with any of them, I’ve always been courteous and kind, and bent over backwards to ensure they’re looked out for by offering to help with their shopping, cleaning and tidying. This really was out of character and I could only think the reason was due to my housemates being afraid of my epilepsy and not wanting it impact on their life, in other words they were putting their interests first and discriminating against my wellbeing.
Turn it around
I was, however very interested in how I’d reacted to this. Four months ago this would have caused me great pain. But, I decided to let it be and turn it into an opportunity. What I’m guessing I’m saying is that there’s not point in crying over spilt milk when you can mop it up with some solid positivity. By chance, I’ve been lucky enough to read lots of Cognitive Behaviour Therapy literature and I thought I’d apply some of these techniques to this situation. So, I decided i) this wasn’t to do with me, it was their immaturity, ii) I’d write a polite email back accepting this text message and iii) look forward and find some friends that mattered. It is quite remarkable at how some people don’t know how to react to individuals being positive during such moments, I’ve found that it does ensure one thing - It makes them stop to think and consider their actions, reflect and respond. This response may never come your way, but it may turn impact upon someone else’s good fortune, and to me I think that’s a positive outcome.
It’s easy to wallow and be annoyed at these times. But maybe as epileptics we’ve forgotten one thing, we also have a responsibility to communicate with others how they get it wrong from time to time allowing them to reflect on their actions. And I’m always a true believer that this can only be done in a calm and polite way.
I hope no one experiences what I did, but I do hope you’re able to react to disability discrimination with confidence and pride knowing you can inform the general crowd a little respect wouldn’t go amis
NP
The situation
I have been ill for the past few months following the brave decision to come down off my Anti Epileptic Medication’s Keppra and Zonegran. Previous to this, I made sure that I’d found somewhere comfortable to live with good a fresh set of friends and kind people. During my withdrawal from my AED’s, my seizure’s increased, my speech reduced due to lack of mental cognition, my confidence dropped and I became a hermit to my own room. To avoid this feeling of aloneness and shame I sought some comfort in my flatmates, I didn’t want them to consider me as a recluse or different person. Previous to this, I had many friends, played rugby, competed in Strongman competitions, held a senior position in a local special needs school – so I was very faithful I’d recover to my normal self. Upon mentioning my epilepsy and it’s actual nature to my flatmates, two of them became more distant and they began to avoid me. During this time, my work decided to consider ending my contract – this also added to my stress levels and of course more seizures. I did have some other friends, and thankfully a very supportive girlfriend – I am still forever grateful for her support throughout these tough times.
My recovery
I recovered. I found biofeedback and it worked for me. My medication levels are at a very low level now and I use some new acquired skills and I’m currently having an absence once every week – if that. I have my job back and I begin teaching again in September. This is awesome to know, I thought, as I had July and August to recover to full strength and chill. I thought I’d covered everything. My flatmates knew about my epilepsy, my friends knew and I had my job back. Awesome…I thought I could relax.
The Shocker
Yesterday morning, I receive a text message on my mobile phone from my house mate:
“As you know, your 6 month contract runs out at the end of August and unfortunately we won’t be renewing it…sorry for any inconvenience this may cause”.
There are four of us in the house, I was the only one to receive this ‘text message’. I have never fallen out with any of them, I’ve always been courteous and kind, and bent over backwards to ensure they’re looked out for by offering to help with their shopping, cleaning and tidying. This really was out of character and I could only think the reason was due to my housemates being afraid of my epilepsy and not wanting it impact on their life, in other words they were putting their interests first and discriminating against my wellbeing.
Turn it around
I was, however very interested in how I’d reacted to this. Four months ago this would have caused me great pain. But, I decided to let it be and turn it into an opportunity. What I’m guessing I’m saying is that there’s not point in crying over spilt milk when you can mop it up with some solid positivity. By chance, I’ve been lucky enough to read lots of Cognitive Behaviour Therapy literature and I thought I’d apply some of these techniques to this situation. So, I decided i) this wasn’t to do with me, it was their immaturity, ii) I’d write a polite email back accepting this text message and iii) look forward and find some friends that mattered. It is quite remarkable at how some people don’t know how to react to individuals being positive during such moments, I’ve found that it does ensure one thing - It makes them stop to think and consider their actions, reflect and respond. This response may never come your way, but it may turn impact upon someone else’s good fortune, and to me I think that’s a positive outcome.
It’s easy to wallow and be annoyed at these times. But maybe as epileptics we’ve forgotten one thing, we also have a responsibility to communicate with others how they get it wrong from time to time allowing them to reflect on their actions. And I’m always a true believer that this can only be done in a calm and polite way.
I hope no one experiences what I did, but I do hope you’re able to react to disability discrimination with confidence and pride knowing you can inform the general crowd a little respect wouldn’t go amis
NP
Last edited: