Do you try to explain away your seizures?

[Endless]

I find myself trying to talk myself out of the fact that something is a seizure. I just explain them away.

Like today - saw a spider dangling in front of me. Reached out to get it, and there was nothing to get, but it looked like it was still there. Then it disappeared and appeared next to me. Again, reached out and grabbed it but there was nothing to grab. It looked like it was still there for about 20 seconds.

I tell myself it is my eyes playing tricks on me. It couldn't possibly be a seizure, because it didn't feel like one.

Or a week or so ago, when I smelled some kind of burning chemical smell. I told myself it was my neighbor doing some kind of bizzare home repairs. Not a seizure.

I completely lost track of a TV show plot. It seemed like I lost about 2-3 minutes during a crucial dialogue. Must be inattention, right?

I was at the dog park talking to some woman with a nice australian shepherd. All of the sudden she gives me this very weird look and walks away. I have no idea why. (This sometimes happens when I have a simple partial and say stuff that I think is something else, or when I have a complex partial and say wacky stuff and don't know what I've said). But, the strange look MUST be because the lady is strange, not a seizure, right?

Lately I've been feeling my brain moving inside my skull. Very weird feeling. It must be the flu, not a seizure, right? (if it was a seizure, where in the brain would it be coming from? I have TLE - doesn't sound like TLE)

None of this weird stuff is seizures, right? I mean, everybody gets this stuff, right?! Or there's a logical explanation, right?!

 

[Loopy Lou]

i find myself more explaining to other people rather than trying to convince myself

"oops sorry, was daydreaming"

"nervous twitch, must be tired"

"clumsy me!"

 

[ericksonmj]

Ummm yeah. I guess that I'm still in kind of a denial stage and try to explain away anything like a seizure, Smells, "Zoning out", waking up with bloody lips and bitten tongue.

Trying hard to come to grips with this but its easier to make excuses for any one that notices.

 

[twc]

I find myself day dreaming or stairing off into the unknown all the time. I done this since child hood and always got the "Earth to Tommy" from my family member or friends.

Tom

 

[sah313]

I always explain away my seizures and i think its down to habit more than anything. Im always telling people im daydreaming or my eyes are playing tricks on me, its not until i think about whats going on that it dawns on me what just happened and how frequent these things go on!

Sah

 

[Endless]

It doesn't help when I call my neuro's office to tell them that the doc is right - I need a higher dose. I explain my last seizure (seeing a spider that wasn't there). The nurse says, "oh, I have tricks of the eye all the time - see a shadow or a feather floating or something." I already tried to tell myself that. But that was so not it.

 

[sah313]

that happens to me all the time too! i try to explain it to people and they say everyone thinks they see things and its just a trick of the eye, they dont realise that you can actually see it as if its real and in front of you. If you had said you saw a rhino charging through your garden they might take it more seriously! ha ha

Sah

 

[Endless]

Sah,

That is SO IT! That darn spider was very sharp and detailed, like a regular spider. It was hanging about 1 foot from my face. I can guarantee it wasn't a feather. People who don't have seizures just don't understand. I'm figuring out a better way to explain it to them, so they do understand.

 

[daisy.girl]

I guess I still think these little things are normal. If fact, when I remember when I told some friends about driving to a place and not remembering how I got there, not even sure what road I took. They said....that is not a seizure, it happens to everyone.

I am still pretty new to this, and to be honest....I am not sure how much of what I see and feel are really seizures either. Sometimes, I think I may not have seizures at all. Afterall, doesn't everyone zone-out sometimes?

Endless, if those same things happened to me....I would NOT have thought seizure. So, I guess I have a lot to learn.

 

[stephk]

all i can say is that text messaging is a God send.... when talking on the phone the kids always get me sidetracked (wink wink), I explain everything and anything that i can away. Did i mention that my house is haunted?

 

[Crystal11]

I've gotten the "it's just your eyes having trouble" and "your brain is taking a break" from my Mom. Now that I know what I've had my whole life, it seemed so silly when my mom said those things or wave her hand in front of my face to snap me out of it. I guess she thought it worked but I don't know since I was (another famous line) "out of it".

A lot of times I tell myself that I'm tired or try to blame how I feel on other things happening during the day. It's seizures that have gotten me and I sometimes get upset knowing I was "taken away". My twin and roommate also have E and so we watch like hawks sometimes on eachother. It's no good to see my twin and friend have seizures.
My roommate is taking the same meds as me but Sis isn't on anything. Trying to get her to go to Neuro soon.

Anyway, I think most with Epilepsy will go through a denial stage and episodes of it from time to time, almost as a way to say: "I'm okay, it's not so bad" and most of the time it may not be horrible but I bet it's a normal thing for most to do.

Everyone take care

 

[Cint]

i try to explain it to people and they say everyone thinks they see things and its just a trick of the eye, they dont realise that you can actually see it as if its real and in front of you.

I've had that happen also, along with hearing a loud voice that no one else around me hears. So if I were to ask anyone to explain the loud voice like they do the "trick of the eye", they would look at me like I am a lunatic. I know it is only the aura of a tonic/clonic seizure. So that is my story and I am sticking to it.

With my CP's, I usually stare into space and make stupid, nonsensical words, sentences, and when I "snap out of it", I do not remember anything that was said to me or I tried to say, do. Now CP's stop within a couple of minutes, but I used to often come out of a CP and go right into a TC, so no need to explain that to anyone.

 

[sah313]

I think its best to just say about big things you see, no one says a word when I say i can see a soldier next to them or a fire truck go through the corner of the room (I do get a few strange looks though!). It saves everyone saying the strange things they think they see out of the corner of their eyes and also makes them realise its not the same thing.

I also hear noises too Clint, it can make me jump as its mostly loud bangs (like a firework going off just behind me), but I always quiz anyone around me to find out if its real or not. Im just glad I can say its my epilepsy playing up so people dont think im so crazy.

Sah

 

[Katarn112]

That brain moving feeling- could you describe that? I'm wondering if I get the same thing. Sometimes I get this throbbing/twitching feeling, and it feels like it's happening in my brain. Obviously I know my brain is not a muscle and can't twitch, but it feels like it It's so weird. Is it like that, or is it different for you? And does anyone else ever get this?

 

[Endless]

Katarn,

My brain-moving-feeling feels like my brain is free-floating, not attached to anything. It floats around inside my skull, turning in random directions. Like a beachball floating in the ocean.

 

[sunnybunny]

Oh wow! I know that strange look! I guess I say some pretty bizarre things when I have a seizure. I don't realize it though, I feel like what I just said made perfect sense. The only way I know is that I get that look! Don't mean to make light of it but it made me smile.

 

[Rae1889]

Yes, I do. Sometimes when I have a complex partial (I tend to scratch my chest or pick/pull at the clothes or skin) and if its short I usually come back a little confused and daze and my response is "it was just an itch" lol

Once after a TC I told Chad that I was practicing for a swimming competition and it wasnt a seizure. I dont swim anymore. Havent for a long long time. since I stopped camp councilling. But I dont swim in deep deep water because I'm afraid of heights and even in water I know how high up I am and get vertigo and dizzy and sick and panic and all the typical phobia reactions. Then I can't swim anymore and start to sink. until i panic about dying and force myself.