Emotions

[kkruser]

I need some advice. I know that's it's not uncommon for epileptics to go through mood swings, depression, etc, so from other's experience, how do you explain it to people. I've tried so many times to explain it to my parents, when I'm feeling down in the dumps, or maybe overreacting to something, but it always leads to them just saying I'm being a drama queen. Of course, it just adds to my frustration when it's happening.

I'd like some insight from people that have been there. I think they try, but just can't get it.

 

[seagull]

Join club,you get fed up trying to so I don't bother

 

[valeriedl]

I try to keep my head up and stay positive about things. It takes a good bit to get me upset but when it does I loose it and start bawling like crazy.

When I was first diagnosed with epilepsy my best friend who had died in an accident in high school, over 10 years before, mother called me to see how I was. About a minute into the conversation I started crying my head off and I don't think my friends name was even brought up once. I had to give the phone to my husband because I couldn't stop. Even right now I feel like I could start crying again. I think it's because my memory is so bad that I can't remember all the things that we'd done together. I'll be going through the house and find something of hers or pictures of us together and have to put it down where I can't see it and do something else.

The stupidest time was when a tv character on a show that I really like had died. I had tears pouring down my face! I kept telling myself that the man himself was still alive it was just the character who was dead but my brain wouldn't listen. My husband came into the room and saw I had a pile of Kleenex laying beside me and he couldn't believe I was getting that upset over it.

Being angry is the one I have the most problems with and I know it's because of the Keppra. This is the one that no one understands no matter how I try to explain it. It doesn't take much at all to set me off to the point that I'm yelling and screaming. I can't believe we don't have holes in our walls because I've come so close to punching them so many times. It doesn't matter if it's someone I know or not I'll just go off. My family will start yelling at me to calm down but I just can't do it.

I felt so bad once when my friends 3 and 5 year old kids started coloring on my $20 coffee table. I started screaming like crazy! My husband told me to stop and my friend said she'd buy me a new table but the words just kept coming out of my mouth louder and louder. My friend left because I kept screaming at her kids to the point they were crying. After I calmed down and realized what I'd done I called her and apologized right away, I still do every time I see her. Luckily we joke about it now but I feel so bad that I'd done it in the first place.

 

[kkruser]

I agree, to a point, but on the other hand, I just wish they would be able to understand what it's like to be on cloud 9 one minute, and 30 minutes later be so upset there are tears rolling down my face. Or to be afraid to do something, because you might have a seizure.

Example of the latter, they talked me into going to a haunted house for Halloween. I argued all week, but eventually gave in. Surprise, surprise, there were strobes in it and had to walk through 75% with my eyes closed.

My emotions just get the best of me either way, sad or angry. I just seem to peek when it's something minor. If it's serious... Watch out, because I'm done for days sometimes. The only positive about when I'm angry is I usually direct it at myself, so I don't fight with others, per say, just get upset.

 

[resaebiunne]

I have E but I have also been diagnosed with bipolar. I would say if you are having serious issues you should consider seeing a psychiatrist to rule out anything else that might be going on. Depression is more than just being happy or sad or irritable. It can be disabling just by itself. I can remember times when I just felt angry for no particular reason and over time I have learned that it was probably nothing I or anything someone had done to me or others but just my mental state at that time.

Personally, I have never really felt the need for others to understand me. That said, if you feel that it is something that would help you, there are places, such as this forum, where you can come for support. People often have trouble relating to things that they have never experienced themselves so it is easiest to seek solace in places where likeminded people congregate. Unfortunately, family and friends can only offer so much support and understanding. Sometimes we just have to go it alone.

You mentioned that your family took you to a haunted house with strobe lights. Do you know for sure that your epilepsy is triggered by strobes?

Edit: I figured I should add that you should consider the side effects of the medications that you are on. Personally, I take Keppra and many people find that it can cause "kepprage". I have never experienced this myself, but it might be worth considering. If the medications you are on are causing you these issues you should talk to your doctor about switching to something different.

 

[kkruser]

Strobe lights have made me dizzy in the past. I've never had a tonic clinic seizure from them, but I don't find it to be a great idea to test it either. Much rather be safe and stay away from them.