I cant remember if i have ever posted before.

[gal109]

After months of weird moods etc and being these medications - [Sertraline which started all my symptoms off, Citalopram, Mirtazapine, Prozac, and then sertraline and mirtazapine again.] [second time i had sertaline i burst out crying laughing simultaneously, talking jibberish] I have been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, as i have severe depression and mania type symptoms. as these meds brought on manic symtpoms. I also have random outbursts of laughing/anger/crying wich has been dubbed bipolar behaviour. I also have voices in my head. I currently take Sodium Valproate Epilium 900mg daily, and Quetiapine 100mg. Throughout trying to sort out what was wrong with me i have suffered this AWFUL Depersonalisation and Derealisation; which includes me feeling outside my body, disconnected from my body such horrible peculiar and at times not able to be put into words sensations. The depersonalisation is REALLY bad. And when i say bad i mean BAD, with a capital B. I have also had other weird experiences such as smelling and tasting things that arent there [i once 'tasted'my brother in my mouth - sounds odd but i really did and felt him in my body' these were said to be psychotic delusions. However im still not sure. I have racing thoughts, jumbled fuzzy feelings inmy head, and Zoning out spells. - I sort of stare into space, and although i am aware its happening, my eyes fix on a spot and i feel like im just fading i cant control it. I had an eeg right at the start and slight abnormalities showed up in my left temperol lobe. [spikes and sharps or somthing] - but the awful doctors and psychiatrist dismissed it. I had a second one [sleep deprived] when i was on Mirtazapine and it showed abnormalities in the temperol lobe again, but again, they dismissed it. I had also been suffering bad ice pick headaches. i had an MRI wich was normal. (this was 6 months ago) The last two weeks i have been suffering a migraine and nausea which was SO painful. i had a 3 day eeg a few days ago I was admitted on monday and had another migraine and threw up 3 times. they gave me codine. It was meant to be a 5 day eeg but the techinian said they had enough evidence when i pressed a button on the machine when i had my symptoms . he said the same abnormalities had shown up but they could be in the range of nromal. (i saw on the screen it said one time - XL spike and XL event.'] - no idea what it means. but i was just crying when he said he doesnt think i have temperol lobe epilepsy becus the abnormalities must be for something and i have felt weird since this last migraine i cant think straigh t and sometimes i feel like the ground is like shuddering underneath me or falling down slightly for a second. I dont know whats going on ive never felt as weird as i do today its horrible. I feel like another one of me could walk through the door thats how out of mybody i feel and my arms dont feel like they are attached to my body and i feel i cant hardly stand up im so weak. im 17. thanks.

 

[Nakamova]

Hi gal109,
I'm sorry if you're struggling with getting a diagnosis and treatment for your symptoms. It sounds like you have a lot going on and have been having a rough ride. At this point, do you think the Valproate and Quetiapine are helping at all? If the Valproate is helping, that might be one sign that your symptoms are seizure-related. Are you seeing a therapist and/or neurologist who can help you figure out if there's a way to get your symptoms under control? It can be tricky, since some medications for bipolar/depression are better than others when it comes to seizure disorders or migraines.

It's important to try and figure out what things are side effects from the meds, what things are related to bipolar disorder, and what may be migraine/seizure symptoms. Do you keep a diary? It might help in terms of tracking meds and other things, and also seeing if there are specific triggers in your environment or routines that may be making things worse.

I hope you feel better soon. Were you give anything to help with the migraine?

Best,
Nakamova

 

[nicholas:)]

Hi ya! I went through something similar last year - now I'm on Quetiapine 500mg, Mirtazapine 45mg and Clonazapam 5.5 plus others. I had to keep looking in the mirror to find my identity but even then I could not associate the image in the mirror with my self - I lost who I was. I was put on Diazepam to begin with then that was decreased until the other meds were introduced. I was introduced to tegretol and take 800mg.

I was referred to the mental health team and they were a great help - I hope you get the support you need.

 

[Bathtub]

Hi gal109 I agree with Nakamova, you do sound like you're having a really rough ride at the moment. Plus whatever happened to have them put you onto sertraline in the first place
I'm only a newbie here but learning fast. My feelings from what you wrote are two-fold - 1, if they stopped the 5-day eeg early, it must surely mean they found what they are looking for? I think the worse situation would have been, monitoring the full five days and still seeing nothing unusual, particularly if you had been having the seizures during that time and they still weren't showing on the EEG? 2- if the issues aren't caused by epilepsy of some form, then why do they have you on anti-seizure medication? Or are they suggesting it's a different form but not TLE? Did I miss something obvious here?

Or is it like the brain disturbances are of chemical origin not electrical? Can they separate those factors? Or just that the chemical imbalance reduces your threshold for bad electrical stuff (excuse the rubbish terminiology!)

Btw, if it's any comfort, I'm impressed by how clearly you managed to express what must be a very wierd jumble of mixed feelings and odd experiences. It does all sound horribly stressful and I wonder if some relaxtion music/exercises might help? Best of luck!

 

[gal109]

Thanks-

Thanks for the mulitiple replies. Nick do you have epilepsy also?
And Bath - they arent sure yet, the epilepsy valproate stuff is for my bipolar supposedly . Last night i was zoning out like fifteen times- is it possible this can happen so frequently if its a seizure? I feel so unwell this morning like im going to be sick again. can epilepsy cause sickness? i just want to stay in bed i feel so weak and tired. I dont know what is going on with me i really dont. After i posted i kind of fell over i dont know what happened i sort of like swayed andfeel on the floor and stopped myself with my hands and my mum was like 'what ARE you doing?' all angry and i was like i dont know i dont know whats happening to me?!?!?!!??! I still feel very dizzy weak headachy and sick and out of my body- i just really want to know if epilepsy can cause any of these symptoms - especially the vomiting and out of bodyness and not being able to "think"

 

[nicholas:)]

Hi Ya! Epilepsy can be difficult to diagnose - I had an hour eeg, 24 hour eeg and a 48 hour video and all were relatively 'normal'. My first neurologist put it down to anxiety so I asked for a second opinion. The second neurologist said ' I probably' have epilepsy and put me tegretol and clonazepam and my seizures dropped from between 100-70 a month to 1-2 a month. She was happy to go by the diaries I kept and by then the knowledge I had. I also have depression and bipolar. I feel you need to keep a diary and get your GP to refer to a neurologist. The difficulty for us is that we suffer from more than one thing and I think this makes it difficult for the GP/Neurologist to diagnose epilepsy.

 

[gal109]

Thanks

But do u know if any epilpesy can cause out of body feeling your arms arent attac hed and make you vomit and feel dizzy and weak ? - 'I still feel very dizzy weak headachy and sick and out of my body- i just really want to know if epilepsy can cause any of these symptoms - especially the vomiting and out of bodyness and not being able to "think"' '

 

[nicholas:)]

Hiya! They could be side effects of your meds or epilepsy related - YOU would need to check out these conditions with your GP

 

[gal109]

So i got my results from the long eeg and they said i dont have epilepsy. But i dont agree. All of this isnt nothing and thats what my neuro seems to be implying. today i woke up with a nose bleed dizziness and i feel faint the entire day my head hurts and i feel confused and dazed and pressure in my head. She said my symptoms are medically unexplained and i just disagreed and got angry - will not have people tellingme im fine when clearly im not i keep seriously zoning out as well.

 

[nicholas:)]

Sorry to hear things went badly. This happened to me so my GP got me a second opinion, and although the eegs came back as normal I was put on Tegretol and Clonazepam and my seizures reduced dramatically!

 

[julie wishes]

Wow sweetie. This sucks. I hope you keep fighting for yourself. Try talking calmly to your doctor and explain in detail what you are feeling, and try to keep it simple. Journal all you can. Also you can ask for a second opinion, which means a different neurologist.

You are on many meds and they have yucky side effects. Maybe you should speak to your MD about each one and why you are on them and if there are alternatives to each one. Change out each one if possible, but one at a time and see if anything gets better. If you change all at once, you won't know which one is the cause. Not saying its your meds. Just a thought to rule out that the meds are or are not the cause of your issues.

I can't say if what you are feeling is seizures or not. I don't know enough. If you look on this site you can read about different types of seizures and maybe something will make sense. Remember your menstrual cycle will cause waves of different feelings throughout the month and can affect seizure activity. Also, migrains themselves can make you sick and unsteady. Good luck hun. I wish you the best and applaud your attempt to figure this out. Keep going to the ER if necessary. But try to remain calm so they take you seriously. When I was upset, they seemed to stop listening, when i got calm and stated exactly what what happening, they seemed to lesten better. Just an idea.