jlismberry
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Hello everyone. I'm new to this forum and don't know how fast people usually respond, but hopefully someone here can help me.
I'm a 19 year old female who was diagnosed with partial complex seizures when I was 12. Because I was so young, my neurologist only told my parents the important things and, being my parents, they told me only good news.
This is why I only learned of the side effects of Trileptal only recently, when I started wondering if the weird things I felt weren't just inherent.
But I'm not here to gripe about the memory loss, the fatigue, the auras, etc. I was weaned off Trileptal in the course of one month this past summer because I had been seizure-free for two years. It was the worst experience of my life. I hardly remember that month; it all seems like a big blur. Over the past three months, I have become depressed, restless, easily irritated and ready to cry at the drop of a hat or at the smallest thing. I can't seem to hold on to any older memories and have trouble recalling recent ones. I cry at everything. I have gained 15 pounds and this has caused me to lose any self confidence I have and I feel inferior and ugly. I have night terrors in which I pant, scream and jump out of bed, terrified. Restless leg syndrome keeps me from falling asleep like I used to. I feel slower and more confused. I don't feel like myself - it's as if I'm watching things from afar. I can't control my emotional outbursts. One second I am having a normal conversation, the next I am in a state of panic, crying and screaming for someone to please do something because I don't understand how I feel and can't stop it. My wonderful relationship of one year is on the line because I just want to save him from the pain, and my family members are walking around on eggshells, afraid to set me off.
Essentially, I guess I'm here because I am angry that my neurologist did not warn me that ANY of this would happen. I understand not relaying side effects to a scared 12 year-old-girl, but I do not understand not warning a mature 19 year-old college students about what it's like to go off Trileptal. Personally I feel like my doctor has truly failed to treat me properly, and I intend to tell him all this during my next visit on Dec. 21. My regular family doctor informed me that depression and changes in mood come with this after that horrible month. Why didn't my neurologist?
What prompted me to post this was anger. For the first time in my life, I am angry that I suffered for seven years from terrible side effects and continue to suffer now after I'm seizure free. But the moment of anger has passed. Now I need help.
If anyone has gone through this, knows anyone who has or is experiencing anything similar, or can help in any way, please reply.
I want to feel like myself again.
I'm a 19 year old female who was diagnosed with partial complex seizures when I was 12. Because I was so young, my neurologist only told my parents the important things and, being my parents, they told me only good news.
This is why I only learned of the side effects of Trileptal only recently, when I started wondering if the weird things I felt weren't just inherent.
But I'm not here to gripe about the memory loss, the fatigue, the auras, etc. I was weaned off Trileptal in the course of one month this past summer because I had been seizure-free for two years. It was the worst experience of my life. I hardly remember that month; it all seems like a big blur. Over the past three months, I have become depressed, restless, easily irritated and ready to cry at the drop of a hat or at the smallest thing. I can't seem to hold on to any older memories and have trouble recalling recent ones. I cry at everything. I have gained 15 pounds and this has caused me to lose any self confidence I have and I feel inferior and ugly. I have night terrors in which I pant, scream and jump out of bed, terrified. Restless leg syndrome keeps me from falling asleep like I used to. I feel slower and more confused. I don't feel like myself - it's as if I'm watching things from afar. I can't control my emotional outbursts. One second I am having a normal conversation, the next I am in a state of panic, crying and screaming for someone to please do something because I don't understand how I feel and can't stop it. My wonderful relationship of one year is on the line because I just want to save him from the pain, and my family members are walking around on eggshells, afraid to set me off.
Essentially, I guess I'm here because I am angry that my neurologist did not warn me that ANY of this would happen. I understand not relaying side effects to a scared 12 year-old-girl, but I do not understand not warning a mature 19 year-old college students about what it's like to go off Trileptal. Personally I feel like my doctor has truly failed to treat me properly, and I intend to tell him all this during my next visit on Dec. 21. My regular family doctor informed me that depression and changes in mood come with this after that horrible month. Why didn't my neurologist?
What prompted me to post this was anger. For the first time in my life, I am angry that I suffered for seven years from terrible side effects and continue to suffer now after I'm seizure free. But the moment of anger has passed. Now I need help.
If anyone has gone through this, knows anyone who has or is experiencing anything similar, or can help in any way, please reply.
I want to feel like myself again.