New with epilepsy and apt. issues

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Rose7

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Hi, I am new and have epilepsy.

About 2 years ago living in an apartment that I have since moved from, the couple below me fought violently many nights all night long. The swearing and screaming and things crashing would cause me to seize. (anyone else like this?)

One morning after an especially eventful night, I woke with the worst pain imagineable and thus began my a million and one doctor visits. I have a badly herniated C4/5 with a small herniation to the C3/4 as well. The pain was worse than natural childbirth.

There went my one handed push ups. I could hardly move my fingers. I couldnt not lift a dinner plate and when I got to be able to lift plates, if I put my hand down, I would lose feeling in my hand and drop the plate.

I've lost all kinds of strength. I got very depressed. I went from a super strong capable person to someone needing help getting out of the tub.

After mri's, nerve conduction studies, and physical therapy, I am making improvements. I have worked my a$$ off.

The couple broke up but the one tenant left continued to make noise in the middle of the night just in a different form (sudden loud music - OH YAY). My landlord (after explaining my condition) was a total bit$h.

I moved.

The tenants ABOVE me party every weekend LOUDLY. Their stairs are over the bedrooms. They run up them like I imagine a pack of elephants would. They bowl up there or something also. And of course one night he beat up his girlfriend.

I spoke to them without success.

I spoke to our landlord who at first didn't care until I told him about what I have been through and how the last thing I need is a good seizure. Like I am really walking on a thin line here. He asked to tell them about my condition and maybe they would find empathy. I told him that I doubted they would. I have found that usually when people find out that you have epilepsy and they consider you interfering with their partying all night long, they will seek to trigger seizures. That is what is now going on.

They pound so hard on the floor that I come flying out of my bed.

I am calling the police (like crazy). An investigator is coming out to speak to us all. So far no noise tickets have been given. The landlord is not allowing me out of my lease and is saying that he will not only keep my security deposit but take me to court to get all the rent until my lease ends (that's July). I am not asking for legal information about renting (I know about that).

I am asking if anyone knows of anything else I can do. I am desperate. I don't know what I will do if I end up in the state that I was in. I don't have much help in my life. I don't drive. My body is my car. I don't want to be here if I get to where I can't move again. I am afraid of being in a wheel chair. I've worked so hard. Thank you.

Rose
 
For clarification, I am not new to epilepsy just new here.

I am not able to sleep on weekends (at all : work weekend days< can{"t nap during the day) so I am sleep deprived which is making seizures more frequent. Not to mention that now I am becoming afraid to go to sleep.
 
Hi Rose, Welcome to CWE!

I know moving is stressful, but it sounds like staying in one place might be even more so. The best thing to do is take a straightforward look at your options. In the ideal scenario, you get your upstairs neighbors to quiet down. Do you know for sure that they are deliberately trying to provoke you, or are they just inconsiderate and oblivious? Sometimes just a face-to-face talk can make a big difference (it worked with feuding neighbors in my building). If it's available, you might want to try mediation to resolve things. Community mediation services are often free or very inexpensive, and mediation has a good track record if all parties have a stake in finding common ground. If getting the neighbors to change doesn't seem likely, then the next step is deciding whether you can survive another 7 months, or whether you need to bite the bullet and move out. If you decide to stay, look into sound insulation, noise cancelling headphones, and things that might help you sleep more deeply. If those don't do the trick, then you need to move out. Will your landlord let you sublet? Keep asking for a little give on his part, especially if you're able to find a replacement tenant.

I hope you are able to find some peace and quiet.

Best,
Nakamova
 
Do you know for sure that they are deliberately trying to provoke you, or are they just inconsiderate and oblivious?

Well .... they yell my name as loudly as possible and stomp their feet as loudly as they can so I would say it is pretty deliberate. This is why I said I am sure that it is lol.

Sometimes just a face-to-face talk can make a big difference (it worked with feuding neighbors in my building).

The face to face was about my condition to no avail. I told them what their stomping, loud noises can do. So putting together what I said above and educating them, I would say they are attempting to trigger seizures.


If it's available, you might want to try mediation to resolve things. Community mediation services are often free or very inexpensive, and mediation has a good track record if all parties have a stake in finding common ground.

Thank you, I will look into that.

If getting the neighbors to change doesn't seem likely, then the next step is deciding whether you can survive another 7 months, or whether you need to bite the bullet and move out. If you decide to stay, look into sound insulation, noise cancelling headphones, and things that might help you sleep more deeply.

How do those things work, if anyone knows? I am going to look into that, thank you.

But yeah I may have to bite the bullet and move and see my landlord in court. Thank you.
 
Sound insulation can be anything from a heavy layer of material covering a door, to carpeting the stairs, to a drop ceiling with more insulation. It would probably need to be coordinated with your landlord, so that might not be feasible. Noise cancelling headphones are pretty good, but I don't know how easy they are to wear while sleeping. If you are a light sleeper, then sometimes taking an over-the-counter supplement like melatonin can help.
 
I'd suggest the ear plugs if the protective headphones are uncomfortable. I've worn them at loud concerts and they really help.

The stress they are adding to your life is definitely not good for you. It shows total disrespect for your medical condition. Wouldn't that be construed as disturbing the peace?
 
Also....

If you have a landlord/tenant bureau (or any organization that regulates tenancy) I'd find out what my rights are as a tenant, what the landlord can or cannot do to you & under what circumstances, & what other options are available to you.
 
Hi Rose,

firstly I'm sorry to hear of the trouble your inconsiderate neighbours are causing you.

Noise has been a big issue for me and I have used foam earplugs for twenty years, they are usually quite effective, just ensure you place them well inside the ear and that you use a new pair each night to ensure their effectiveness.

Is it possible for you to have someone help you switch your bedroom to another room so that you are not underneath the stairs, since alot of their thumping is coming from that area.

I realsise these suggestions are only short term fix, but they might be able to give you a bit more sleep.

It also might be a good idea to audiotape their goings on. That way when the investigator comes you can let him or her listen to it. Also keep a note if you can of when and for how long they carry on like this. If you are sleeping (hopefully) an audio recording will still do this for you.

I hope you find a resolution to this problem as sleep is so important to our health.

take care, Roo
 
Great suggestion Roo! I didn't think of switching rooms. Sleeping in another room sounds like a good option to me, too. I suppose laying out a mattress on the floor to save your back or a good recliner may be mobile enough to get away from the noise in comfort.

I believe in karma. They will get it back one day.
 
Yes, I agree with epileric. If you have a renter's board or tenancy board you can complain to them. There is a section that allows you put of your lease due to medical conditions. Yours counts as pretty serious.
They will either allow you to move, or they will evict the other tenants for noise complaints. At least in Canada anyway.

Other than that, call the police and demand to charge them with harassment and make a recording of the noise and the name calling when it starts.
 
Outside of building a sleeping chamber (not really a good idea) I have nothing to compare to the great suggestions of the others. I can understand the frustrations of dealing with clueless inconsiderate people in an apartment. A couple above us once played the 'Macarena' song as loud as they could till 2am for 3 months. It would have been better had I not been working at 5am everyday during that time. We did all we could but to no avail.

I hope you find an answer soon.
 
I am going to try the ear plugs, I am just not sure how much noise it will block out, they are REALLY loud. Plus there's the constant sudden slamming. I feel like bombs are going off.

If you have a landlord/tenant bureau (or any organization that regulates tenancy) I'd find out what my rights are as a tenant, what the landlord can or cannot do to you & under what circumstances, & what other options are available to you.

I found out that an "investigator" just means another police officer. While one is still coming out, I was told it won't really matter. (it's just a repeat of what has been done).

BUT I did speak to Center for Disputes and I was told that I can sue my landlord for every night (percentage of my rent) that I have been wide awake, because yes, it is disturbing the peace AND I am entitled as a renter to a "peaceful environment."

I am allowed that even if I did not have epilepsy.

Being that I DO have epilepsy and my landlord and tenant have been informed about my condition, this is turning criminal (can you believe THAT ?) I mean I thought that it should be but I didn't know if it actually was. I was told to sue the landlord, and bring a doctor's note and my condition.

I was also told that the next time I have to call the police to demand harrassment charges.

I hope you find a resolution to this problem as sleep is so important to our health.

Yes, the point that I have made to my landlord a thousand times.

Oh by the way, I don't know if I mentioned that the landlord emailed me an attachment with a noise ordinance complaint form. He told me in email (which will be great to bring to court) that he isn't doing ANYTHING until I file that form. I found out today (from a lawyer) that I CAN'T file the form. I asked why and was told that it wouldn't stand, it wouldn't be LEGAL. It is a landlord form! I don't know if he doesn't know this or is lying to me but either way I can't file this form so that he will help me!

As much as I would love to move to another room (that is what I did in the last place), this guy is worse than the last. He stomps and bangs with his herd of elephants all over the entire apartment.

They will get it back one day.

I really hope so.

I have found more gratitude with what I can do than ever before. I did take movement for granted before this "accident". Too many people will never know what it is like to have their lives turned upside down and painfully.

Thank you everybody. I will let you all know what happens when I go to court.

Rose
 
Outside of building a sleeping chamber (not really a good idea) I have nothing to compare to the great suggestions of the others. I can understand the frustrations of dealing with clueless inconsiderate people in an apartment. A couple above us once played the 'Macarena' song as loud as they could till 2am for 3 months. It would have been better had I not been working at 5am everyday during that time. We did all we could but to no avail.

Has anyone ever seized simply because they are super annoyed? I think it is worse when you are just exhausted.
 
It could be a combination of stress, noise and lack of sleep. Is there any church, institution, synagogue, college, hotel or other building nearby where you can obtain access to get away from the noise and sleep better? I experienced this kind of stuff off campus in college and slept in the building where security personnel watched over me. I'd also suggest that since your landlord seems to be kind of bent against you that you take any precious possessions (like jewelry, sentimental small items, etc.) and place them in a safety deposit box. Just a way to protect anything while you are sleeping somewhere else.

Then, if you have to pay for another place like a hotel, charge your landlord the fee.
 
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I have kids and animals. One kid and one animal is very sick. All are being very affected by what is going on but I can't take them or leave them. I do not drive and we don't have anyone who can help. It might mean going to a hotel if I could afford it upfront but I don't think I can. Even if I did, it would mean packing everyone up in the middle of the night and dragging them through snow.

Even if I took the kids out, I would be afraid to leave the animals for the reasons you mentioned about valuables.

As hard as it is to stay (because of my health and well being), I have to stay to keep everyone calm. Of course my seizures aren't helping anyone. I have been told to go to the hospital every time I seize now for records, and that again means leaving everyone.

I am packing and looking for apartments. I have to find the money to move now. I will sue to be let out of the lease and in that will include that I get my security deposit back. I think he would have a certain amount of time to give that back.

Thank you very very much.

Rose
 
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