Other People's Negative Emotions and E

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Pinkattitude

Pinkattitude

Stalwart
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Is is just me, or are other people's E effected by having someone "emotionally vomit" on them? This is when they are full of some bad feelings (justified or not) and they decide to just take it out on you - full force, generally.

One of my first, and scarier, seizures when they started up again happened after a person I know decided that one small disagreeing during a group conversation meant the I "always disagree with" her, and she just laid into me like nobody's business. I was stunned, and the others at the table (about 8 or so of us) were all confused, too. One person who knew her well said it was just something she did once in a while.

But I felt like she had stuck a knife in my gut and twisted it. When I got home, it was lunch time. I heated up a skillet and melted butter in it. True to my seizures, I didn't notice any missed time because I don't fall down, I didn't knock anything over, and no one was there to say, "hey, where you been?" But in a few minutes, I noticed a very puzzling burn on my finger. I'd had a seizure and kept my finger on the skillet during it. Made me scared to cook for a few months.

Since then, I've noticed that whenever someone emotionally vomits on me at work (where it's most likely to happen), I'll come home and have a seizure in the evening.

When I notice that it's happening (the emotional spewing), I try to get out of whatever it is as fast as possible. But I'm not always a fast thinker in these situations.

Is this just my personal trigger, or do others have this happen?
 
It's not just you. Bad feelings and stressful situations effect everyone. Some more than others. Trying to avoid those stressful situations is a good idea. But sometimes you can't, so you need to figure out a way you can cope with it. Hopefully that will stop your stress triggered seizures.
 
I agree with both of you. Bad feelings, stress and seizures go hand in hand.
 
I try to avoid it, but emotional venting sometimes starts off as softer complaining. Being someone who wants to help the situation, I'll say something to help foster understanding and cooperation. Sometimes, this just leads to the complainer getting angrier, which always takes me by surprise.

It's hard for me to understand why someone will take my attempt to help as their opportunity to complain/emotionally vent more loudly.

My boss is really good at this. Monday, I will be asking to be removed from his office because it gets to be too much when he is 3000 miles away and still venting/complaining loudly via emails. Sigh. Others in the office have recognized that he's a "drama king" and a "control freak". So, they will understand, thankfully.
 
How soon are you going to be a grandmother? That is something to look forward too.

Granddaughter or grandson?
 
I have found that when someone will take things out on me;that I have learned to stay calm and it has kept me from having more seizures. I will talk to myself when I'm upset and not take it out on someone.

Since my temper has cooled so it seems has my seizures.
 
Ruth said:
How soon are you going to be a grandmother? That is something to look forward too.

Granddaughter or grandson?
Click to expand...

Ruth, she's having a granddaughter. Due date is now :) But it's her first, and those are very unpredictable, you know!
 
Belinda5000 said:
I have found that when someone will take things out on me;that I have learned to stay calm and it has kept me from having more seizures. I will talk to myself when I'm upset and not take it out on someone.

Since my temper has cooled so it seems has my seizures.
Click to expand...

I try to stay calm. My boss has a very accusatory way about him and will insist that, "we can't have any errors!" (even if the cause of the "error" was information I received from him, it's still my fault) The issues that he gets upset about are usually ones where it involves people he is more interested in. If the same thing happened to other people, he's let it go. And these are not life or death "errors" by far. Very frustrating. I have yet where he wants to be part of the solution instead of just being the blamer. He's also not one to apologize after spewing venom at me. Others in the office are noticing, so there may be higher people speaking to him when he gets back. (I hope)
 
Pink
Let him say what he will to you and than, just smile and let him know why you did it.
 
Stress is one of my number one seizure causes. When someone is yelling at me I try to let it go in one ear and out the other only listening to the parts that I need too. I know that's easier said than done though.

Is your boss the highest person at the company that you work for or is there someone above him? If there is try having a talk with the higher up and tell him what's going on. If there is a manager or someone like that then you could try talking to them too. They could have a talk with your boss and let him know what he's doing and that he needs to stop.
 
You are waiting by the phone. You will be more nervous than your daughter. At least that was the way it was with my first twins and my Mother.

I didn't know that I was going to have twins until I went into labor. I went to the hospital and the doctor told me. You should have seen the reaction that my husband had. In the 60's, husbands couldn't be with his wife when she was having the babies.

The doctor told him to go home. I lived in GA and my Mother lived in CA. I had no one to cheer me up.

I am glad that your daughter will have you with her!!:hugs:
 
valeriedl said:
Is your boss the highest person at the company that you work for or is there someone above him? If there is try having a talk with the higher up and tell him what's going on. If there is a manager or someone like that then you could try talking to them too. They could have a talk with your boss and let him know what he's doing and that he needs to stop.
Click to expand...

Thankfully 1)My boss is not the highest in the company; and 2)He is currently on vacation for another 2 weeks.

This gave me a beautiful opportunity to feel free to talk with the person who is our Office Manager. She is really the one looking out for support staff. I sent her the whole email interchange from Friday so she would understand my frustration. Literally, this man is over 3000 miles away right now, but the internet is allowing him to totally micromanage me - or try to.

The Office Manager asked me to start keeping a log of things that happen. As she said, anything like harassment is hard to prove or do anything about with out concrete evidence, and feelings are not that.

Thank you for all understanding. I so appreciate this forum and being able to double check things.
 
That's great. I hope something will be done about it now!
 
Ruth said:
I didn't know that I was going to have twins until I went into labor. I went to the hospital and the doctor told me. You should have seen the reaction that my husband had. In the 60's, husbands couldn't be with his wife when she was having the babies.
Click to expand...

Ruth, this is hysterical! I love these surprises! It doesn't happen not because of all the tests they do, and they listen for the heartbeat and hear when there are 2 heartbeats (if they are good at what they do).

I will be, hopefully, close to the baby because my daughter and her boyfriend live with us :) Baby hugs every day, uh huh!
 
I know you will be close to your granddaughter. You are so excited!! I wouldn't be surprised if you got to the hospital first.
 
Ruth, if I drove, that would be so true. But as it is, I have to wait for my husband - and his tendency is to be late, and he's always hard to find because you have to pull his head out of the cloud where he lives first (spacey scientist). :roflmao:
 
That would be one time where it would be tempting to drive. You want to get there alive. You want to see your granddaughter!!

Your son in law will take you with your daughter. I have a feeling that your husband that works in space will be at the hospital. :roflmao:

He wouldn't want to miss it anymore than you will. He will be there. Then you can :cheers:
 
Yes, my husband had better be there in case the new daddy faints! You never know how a guy will respond to seeing such things! :D

And, my husband is a very good presence in the hospital because he is not traumatized by things. My son came flying out with the water, in the sac. My husband wanted to know why his son looked different, and the mid-wife let him know that he had been born "in the caul," and that it bode well for his life! :)
 
Wouldn't that be funny if your husband fainted and the new daddy had to catch him?:roflmao:

I have never heard the expression "in the caul." What does it mean? :ponder:
 
It means he was born in the birth sac that holds the baby and the amniotic fluid in the womb. This usually breaks during birth and comes out with the placenta, I believe. So it's like having a thin veil over the baby when he comes out, and my son looked a bit webbed according to my husband. By the time I saw him, they had taken it off.

I suppose my husband could be the one to faint! It is his daughter having the baby and not me this time :D Thankfully, baby's daddy is probably strong enough to catch my husband.......I think! :roflmao:
 
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