seen the gyno yesterday afternoon after months of exhaustive testing and am now facing surgery. right ovarian cyst began in february and has been actually growing for almost 3 months. is well attached.
pain started in right side w/lower back pain as well, pretty much daily and not worse or better during my period. left ovary hurts as well, alot more so in the last month. if there is a cyst on left it was too small for detection during scope at the end of may. there are no tests left to do so it's time for laproscopic surg.
first week of june i was actually sent for ovarian cancer bloodwork. was so scared i didn't even know myself, which i deal with enough during brain surg recovery.
there was much talk yesterday re: possibility of having to remove the ovary if cyst is too deep, plus the unknowns of finding something on the left. he also said it could be endometriosis but that he'd cauterize while in there.
i was just given the chance to have a child for the first time in my life (am 35) and while at the 6 month stage of surg recovery the cyst showed up. i don't know how to explain how devastating this has been.
also b/c i CANNOT handle having both removed and being on HRT the rest of my life. my mom had cervical cancer when carrying me and could only have one child, full hysterectomy and afterwards HRT, which greatly f'd her up, affected her head to toe for half of her life. NO.
so, going in tuesday. fingers crossed the right cyst will be easily removed, no endometriosis, and nothing/something tiny and removeable on left.
my poor brain trying to re-path and learn how to function with missing parts has not adapted well to this. add that to raging hormones and fear (once again for not knowing where my future is), well, i can only depend on silver linings and actually thank my brain for not making me wake up on the floor after a bad grand mal. impressive
