alivenwell
Veteran
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Shelley, I'm really concerned about that constant level of stress. Find a way to minimize your stress and contact with them. For me, it has been intense exercise combined with long walks. Great music and meditation have also helped me immensely. That stress just creates a breeding ground for seizures and more harassment.
Personally, I'd pull up a chair to their lunch table and join them to look 'sociable'. It'd take some effort on my part to hold back a good smart remark. Kindness is not expected.
Can you speak to any member of the group on a one-to-one basis after work? Are any of them open minded in the slightest way? Can you organize a social event so that you can create an ideal environment for yourself during the event? It'd have to have good food, a family-friendly atmosphere (you get to know their 'other halves'- a most interesting part!), games or some positive activity that's seen by others. Accommodate poor weather conditions with tents, and sell or wager t-shirts with a theme. Provide competition for prizes, especially for little kids. Contact food vendors for the best quality and most decent prices. Can a tent at a local amusement park be rented for one day for the event? Can a food caterer provide service for the event? How many people want to attend?
AND, keep all paperwork of this organized event to yourself. These people need a major distraction. With cooler weather around the corner, you may be able to pull this off by working from home while you call various vendors. It's a win-win situation. If you get to know at least one person's little kid and make a little friend, the parents may follow the pattern, too.
Either the 'group' will want to come in unison and leave together; or they have their own personal agenda and come in according to their own personal schedule; or none of them will come. In any case, it can give you an opportunity to network, and make other friends.
My other thought is to use them to suggest a social event by mentioning exactly what was suggested to you to 'lighten up'. It sounds like it already has a green light from management. Ask them what they would like to do at a company sponsored picnic or outdoor event. Would they want t-shirts, cups, or some other small priced item? Would they prefer junk food? Would they want sports? Do they have little kids...if so what do their kids/spouses like? If the reaction is somewhat positive, then you have a pretty good chance at creating a good event. These people sound like they would be your worst critics and may give you some great feedback on anything that could go wrong. It has to come off in a positive light. 'Borrow' their ideas and make them look like they were your own ideas. It's nasty.
Personally, I'd pull up a chair to their lunch table and join them to look 'sociable'. It'd take some effort on my part to hold back a good smart remark. Kindness is not expected.
Can you speak to any member of the group on a one-to-one basis after work? Are any of them open minded in the slightest way? Can you organize a social event so that you can create an ideal environment for yourself during the event? It'd have to have good food, a family-friendly atmosphere (you get to know their 'other halves'- a most interesting part!), games or some positive activity that's seen by others. Accommodate poor weather conditions with tents, and sell or wager t-shirts with a theme. Provide competition for prizes, especially for little kids. Contact food vendors for the best quality and most decent prices. Can a tent at a local amusement park be rented for one day for the event? Can a food caterer provide service for the event? How many people want to attend?
AND, keep all paperwork of this organized event to yourself. These people need a major distraction. With cooler weather around the corner, you may be able to pull this off by working from home while you call various vendors. It's a win-win situation. If you get to know at least one person's little kid and make a little friend, the parents may follow the pattern, too.
Either the 'group' will want to come in unison and leave together; or they have their own personal agenda and come in according to their own personal schedule; or none of them will come. In any case, it can give you an opportunity to network, and make other friends.
My other thought is to use them to suggest a social event by mentioning exactly what was suggested to you to 'lighten up'. It sounds like it already has a green light from management. Ask them what they would like to do at a company sponsored picnic or outdoor event. Would they want t-shirts, cups, or some other small priced item? Would they prefer junk food? Would they want sports? Do they have little kids...if so what do their kids/spouses like? If the reaction is somewhat positive, then you have a pretty good chance at creating a good event. These people sound like they would be your worst critics and may give you some great feedback on anything that could go wrong. It has to come off in a positive light. 'Borrow' their ideas and make them look like they were your own ideas. It's nasty.
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