Wow, You Are So Wrong!
I can't really explain it but if my auras ever stop I think I'll miss them.

onder: Sounds kinda sick doesn't it. They're kind of like an old friend. Mine are mostly Deja Vu followed by tunnel vision. They started when I was around 8 and disappeared from age 17 - 36. When they came back they were much more intense and were followed by extreme heat in the stomach and chest. I never realized that the anxiety issue was a part of it until now, that part I could do without. I've never had a tonic clonic it seems strange to me that those who have are so afraid of the auras. I mean the worst thing I've done during one is bight my tongue. (Oh and I hit my car with the lawn mower doing $1200.00 in damage.) When I first figured out that I was having auras I thought they would give me time to get to a safe place even when driving. The first (and only) time I tried that I hit a mailbox and I've never driven since. So yea auras are seizures.
I used to feel a little psychic as a child when I had them that's probably why I liked them. I loved Ellen's story of the man in the hat. I think there's more to them than just physical. I can't help but think we are in more in touch with our spiritual world than others. I've read that right temporal lobe epilepsy has been linked with spiritual conversions. I know that I've always known that there was more to life than this world. I never questioned that we are spirits living in human form for a short time and I now feel that is due to my auras.
I probably wouldn't even try to stop them if I didn't know that this is a progressive disease. The not driving part I'm starting to accept but I'll be 44 in a few weeks and my dad died at 50 from a tonic clonic. The only one he ever had after years of complex partials. His dad died at 63 of the same and well I'd like to be around to my see grand children.
Sorry to be so long. I've never been able to tell anyone this. It probably should have been in the padded room, but here seemed appropriate. Thanks.
Hi Flinnegan
Firstly, I was sorry to hear that you lost both your father and grandfather to epilepsy, it must have clouded your views on exactly what epilepsy is, and the definition of it. Had they been diagnosed with epilepsy, or were their deaths unexpected? I was thinking along the lines of SUDEP, are you familiar with this? Sudden Unexplained Death in Epilepsy.
Having just completed and passed a four year university course in epilepsy care and management, I have to say two things in response to your thread.
First of all, I have never ever heard of epilepsy being referred to as a disease, it is a neurological condition, or as was defined by the British neurologist Hughlings Jackson a century ago as a "recurrent, episodic, uncontrolled discharge of nerve tissue".
Secondly, being diagnosed with epilepsy is certainly not a death sentence. Between two and three in every 100 members of the population have recurrent seizures at some time in their lives, fortunately, the majority of these people do not have epilepsy throughout their lives.
I have had epilepsy now for twenty three years, and I'm happy to be able to report that I am seizure free. I would like to say though, that the most terrifying part of having epilepsy, was having the aura, or Simple Partial Seizure. Although the consciousness is not affected during a seizure of this type, when I had one, I was extremely scared, confused, experiencing a variety of emotions, feelings, and generally being in a state of total and absolute terror, I would have the taste and smell, the typical deja-vu, all the symptoms associated with TLE. It was when the electrical activity spread (secondary generalised) that I wasn't "there", I always said that it wasn't me that suffered with epilepsy, but the people around me, as, during a seizure of this type, I was really out of it, so I had no idea what was going on, but with the aura, God, I sure as hell knew what was going on, and I can honestly say, that it was the most terrifying thing I have ever experienced! I would not wish it on my worst enemy. I can however, sort of understand you almost enjoying them, I have read that many people see them as almost a religious experience, a kind of high, almost like being on some kind of "trip" but you try being without them for a while, and I can guarantee, that you will not miss "your friends" at all!
Epilepsy, is not a progressive disease, I'm not sure where you got that from, but I have never ever heard that one before. Some people, such as myself, can be considered for surgery, as long as, after a series of indepth tests and monitoring, it is found that there is a definate focus on the brain, and it can be determined exactly where the seizures start in the brain. After many years of taking various anti-convulsants, I began these tests, and a focus was found, and luckily, I was an ideal candidate for brain surgery.
A diagnosis of epilepsy, is as I have said, not an end to your life, and of course, once a suitable drug regime can be decided, and wether the epilepsy is symptomatic (with a known cause), or idiopathic/cryptogenic (no known cause) most people can lead a completely normal life. Unfortunately, it is society that sees epilepsy as a disability, I have never considered myself to be disabled, and, if epilepsy is the only medical condition I have to put up with in my life, I will consider myself to be very fortunate.
I'm seizure free, and I mean all types of seizure, I have no auras, no tastes, no deja-vu, nothing, I am a totally new person, I will be able to drive again soon, and thanks to my wonderful brain surgeon, and the care I've had from the hospital in London, "normal service has been resumed" I am me again, and living proof, that epilepsy, is NOT a progressive disease!! Stop worrying!!! I don't know where you got that from!!
Best Regards
Elaine x