Constant Battle with Work...

[AndrewIrish]

Hey all, I recently started a new job... and have found myself butting heads with some new limitations...

When I get stressed, or try to do too much multi tasking, I end up having very violent myoclonic jerks and get bad migraines... so violent my entire office team turns around and stares at me like, 'wtf.' My job is based on 'speed', dialing phone numbers manually like crazy... and it just tears me up. I feel like the job drains me a lot more then most and feel like I'm working with a handicap.

I can't flip through 30 screens, type 20 things, talk, dial 10 phone numbers, in like 3 minutes... and while no one has said anything much yet, it's only a matter of time before they start looking at me as some kind of slow poke. It pisses me off 'cuz I'm working as hard as I humanly can... but not as hard as I can. If I push myself to my limits, I'll jerk all over the place and get terrible migraines - so now, I've had to let my foot off the pedal at work just to get by each day, but it's turning me into a mediocre employee when I know I have the capacity to be a stunning one. I just feel so... limited by my poorly-wired brain.

Anyone been here? Advice? I think I just need a place to... uggh... I dunno...

 

[Nakamova]

Hi Andrew --

It might help to take 5 minute mini-breaks every hour where you do "mindful breathing" or other relaxation exercises to help relieve stress. The idea is to do them before the stress builds up. Ask the H-R person if that's acceptable.

 

[Maisy]

As Above and what I just posted before this, sometimes because its on your conscience it can happen more as your also stressed about the seizures happening and worried about what your colleagues think? Don't worry just be yourself which is awesome its a new job nobody expects a hero on day one build yself up slow you'll get there mate :-D

 

[Soniag]

i also have a few problems with work. i told them that i really do need to take it easy and that i can't rush myself with any tasks i am doing. they didn't listen and keep telling me i need to be quicker as i am not going fast enough for them. i also told them my tasks needed to be rotated, but they ignored that and i was often left on my own on the tills for up to eight hours. after i had a complex partial seizure on the till, i saw the doctor and got him to write a note for me to say my tasks must be rotated, which they now do

 

[Wobblez]

Andrew, I totally get where you're coming from. Like you say, you may not be working your "hardest" but you know if you do, you'll end up unwell and even less productive or reliable at work anyway! Its hard to get people to see this. I guess I just wanted to lend you my support and understanding, but Nakamova's suggestion sounds like a good one. Can you speak to your boss and let them know that you are trying your hardest, you're just working within your limitations to ensure your highest performance and own wellbeing? If we didn't have brains, we would be amazing!!!

 

[AndrewIrish]

Andrew, I totally get where you're coming from. Like you say, you may not be working your "hardest" but you know if you do, you'll end up unwell and even less productive or reliable at work anyway! Its hard to get people to see this. I guess I just wanted to lend you my support and understanding, but Nakamova's suggestion sounds like a good one. Can you speak to your boss and let them know that you are trying your hardest, you're just working within your limitations to ensure your highest performance and own wellbeing? If we didn't have brains, we would be amazing!!!

QFT.

Our stupid, very naughty brains!

And no, I still haven't told anyone at work about my E - I'm trying not to mention it unless they bring it up - I'm perfectly fine letting them think I have Tourettes or some kind of 'tick' for the time being... I'm working on a 'They Don't Ask, I Don't Tell' policy.

Also the 'mini break' idea, I don't believe would fly.

 

[MuayThaiFighter]

I'm sorry man, seriously been there and it is kind of degrading. In 2009 I had this kush office job and it was awesome. It was pretty high paced, and was a challenge and I loved it. Then my brain kind of got whacky and that was when the seizure problems became more serious. So work became a huge struggle, and suddenly I wasn't this great employee. So I know the feeling, and all you want is for your brain to just work at the pace you know it can.

I just hope this will be momentary for you and you can start kicking ass at work. Best wishes.