looking for help. please

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nelly

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Hi All!

I'm having a hard time trying to explain to my boyfriend what and how to help me when I have a seizure and after the seizure.
:ponder:

After it's over- he treats me like Im an alien and that I'm bad. I'm already feeling like sh%t and he make me feel 10X worse.
need to feel that I'm safe.

Any suggestions is greatly appreciated.

Thanks much!
 
Hey nelly -- that's terrible that your boyfriend responds that way. How do you treat him when he's struggling? I doubt you make him feel bad...

Can you have your neurologist provide some information that will help him understand what's going on when you have a seizure, and how best to help? A lot of people aren't familiar with partial seizures and think that the person is somehow doing them on purpose or is having a mental breakdown.

He should be especially reassuring and gentle with you during and after the seizure. if you experience any confusion, he should let you know what happened and how long it lasted, and slowly bring you up to speed if necessary. Many folks feel tired after a seizure -- if that's the case for you, he should help you sleep. And he should know that partial seizures can be frightening and depressing for the person experiencing them. if he cares for you, he should help you feel safe, and make sure you feel confident and connected to the world in the aftermath.
 
Thank you !
I know it's hard for him as well. I don't want to come off all bossy and negitive. I think getting him more involved with my condition and a third party involved such as my Dr. It may make sense for him.

Thanks again.:hugs:
 
I only had epilepsy for a year when my husband and I first started dating. My family explained as much as they could to him because they were really learning too.

The first seizure I had with him was a few weeks into the relationship and I ended up in the ER. During the seizure I had no clue who he was, where we were and what we were doing. I can't even imagine what that was like for him.

I don't know what types of seizures you have but I'm sure complex seizures would be more scary for him to see than a simple, I know they are for my husband.

He started coming to my neuro appts with my mom and I when he could, which I know helped a lot. He understood more about what was going on with me because of this.

I don't know how old you are but I was 26 and my husband was 38 when we first met. I know being older helped out a lot too.
 
Look for youtube videos that shows a person what to do during a seizure, I have learned a lot from that and do did one of my relatives. You could also bring your boyfriend with you to one of your neurologist appointments, so that the neurologist could educate your boyfriend on what to do.
 
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