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has anyone had bad experiences during a seizure period wherein perception was phasing in and out and the moments of awareness blurred in with periods of what I guess may be periods of subconscious distortion?
being among people, hearing and misinterpreting, reinterpreting things, (obviously this happens- hence the practice of paramedics to ask the recollection questions, like "why the h*** is there a Kardashian show on tv"? after which inability to answer concisely indicates obvious seizure
)
but really, seeing things, hearing things people say, seeing different things take place, hearing noises, and having them persist on a subconscious level as a perversion and distortion then of reality?
I have experienced this persistent phenomena that began after a certain seizure span (during which the hospital said I had a "psychotic episode"), which I can only guess was from persistent noise, stimulus, lights and chaos of the ER environment (and likely from having had been just prior, put onto Keppra by my neuro)
I have experienced a persistent phenomena since, of strange and atypical deja vu events that circulate back to that hospital event: little blurbs of things I hear now that seem to bring about recollections, people I see around town (maybe they worked at the hospital at the time and are just around town) - but these things seem to evoke a sort of profound revelation of sorts, that doesn't really reveal anything to me (except recollections of certain time spans and flashes of events)
the recollections are emotional and usually stir up a physical and psychological response, some stronger than others, some banal, some pain or trauma related.
has anyone had these types of recurring recollection type of events?
do you think I should consider these a new type of seizure event and take time out/a pill?
these types deja vu encapsulate only that one seizure span in recollection and relevance.
a friend whose sister's ex- has PTSD from Iraq said I might have some type of PTSD even
that seems bizarre, but I guess possible - have any of you heard of PTSD from seizures?
but overall this phenomena seems like a mental piecing together of sequences that are triggered by current fragments of reality that cycle back to this one seizure period
I try not to focus on it because it starts my mind swirling in a bad cyclical process - but when I think it might be "over", maybe a day or two later, if not sooner, another 'thing' pops up that is relevant to that timeframe again
even little things like the coconut water I'm drinking now
it's like I can recall a doctor or someone telling me how good it is, but it's like having heard it as an echo, like an implanted subliminal message even
and so even the issue may be banal (drinking coconut water) this "revelation" process is haunting, and comes into my head when I'm watching a survival show on tv- and it's like *eureka* a ghost just told me to get coconut water - I'm haunted by ghosts telling me anything from drinking coconut water to whisps of things stirring disturbing recollections.
coconut water is delicious by the way
and I'm trying not to think too much about it now because I can feel my heartrate rising and it's making on edge
so I block it out- or try to
I am starting to see a counsellor who seems capable in ways and with whom I have a level of comfort. I'll see for how long and to what extent.
and to the alien ghosts who have been monitoring me - here is my next check-in
read whatever encrypted messages are contained herein and I hope all of this settles soon
I don't like this phenomena
it is subliminal, invasive and psychologically destructive and energy consuming, and turning my energies to bad focus
being among people, hearing and misinterpreting, reinterpreting things, (obviously this happens- hence the practice of paramedics to ask the recollection questions, like "why the h*** is there a Kardashian show on tv"? after which inability to answer concisely indicates obvious seizure
)but really, seeing things, hearing things people say, seeing different things take place, hearing noises, and having them persist on a subconscious level as a perversion and distortion then of reality?
I have experienced this persistent phenomena that began after a certain seizure span (during which the hospital said I had a "psychotic episode"), which I can only guess was from persistent noise, stimulus, lights and chaos of the ER environment (and likely from having had been just prior, put onto Keppra by my neuro)
I have experienced a persistent phenomena since, of strange and atypical deja vu events that circulate back to that hospital event: little blurbs of things I hear now that seem to bring about recollections, people I see around town (maybe they worked at the hospital at the time and are just around town) - but these things seem to evoke a sort of profound revelation of sorts, that doesn't really reveal anything to me (except recollections of certain time spans and flashes of events)
the recollections are emotional and usually stir up a physical and psychological response, some stronger than others, some banal, some pain or trauma related.
has anyone had these types of recurring recollection type of events?
do you think I should consider these a new type of seizure event and take time out/a pill?
these types deja vu encapsulate only that one seizure span in recollection and relevance.
a friend whose sister's ex- has PTSD from Iraq said I might have some type of PTSD even
that seems bizarre, but I guess possible - have any of you heard of PTSD from seizures?
but overall this phenomena seems like a mental piecing together of sequences that are triggered by current fragments of reality that cycle back to this one seizure period
I try not to focus on it because it starts my mind swirling in a bad cyclical process - but when I think it might be "over", maybe a day or two later, if not sooner, another 'thing' pops up that is relevant to that timeframe again
even little things like the coconut water I'm drinking now
it's like I can recall a doctor or someone telling me how good it is, but it's like having heard it as an echo, like an implanted subliminal message even
and so even the issue may be banal (drinking coconut water) this "revelation" process is haunting, and comes into my head when I'm watching a survival show on tv- and it's like *eureka* a ghost just told me to get coconut water - I'm haunted by ghosts telling me anything from drinking coconut water to whisps of things stirring disturbing recollections.
coconut water is delicious by the way
and I'm trying not to think too much about it now because I can feel my heartrate rising and it's making on edge
so I block it out- or try to
I am starting to see a counsellor who seems capable in ways and with whom I have a level of comfort. I'll see for how long and to what extent.
and to the alien ghosts who have been monitoring me - here is my next check-in
read whatever encrypted messages are contained herein and I hope all of this settles soon
I don't like this phenomena
it is subliminal, invasive and psychologically destructive and energy consuming, and turning my energies to bad focus
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