The best of things got to me today

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momof3boys

momof3boys

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I have felt like my plate has been loaded with tons of stuff to do, and today was the day the plate fell. I woke up feeling fine, but then found out that someone broke into our van, causing them to break open the gas tank area, and ripping off the gas cap, and leaving the van with no gas cap. Ive been having to deal with alot of stuff. Kid's School meetings, medication issues with our son, Medication issues with my husband, getting surgery scheduled for his hand at the end of this month, the kids are finally getting out of school in 7 more school days! :noevil: Ivce had to delt with health payments for my husband, kids and myself. Im the one who takes cares of everything around the house. Paying bills, cleans, cooks, everything. Its gotten to be alot to have to take in. I havnt had the best of sleep over the past few nights, even when taking the melatonin. But today I had three back to back seizures. I dont recall what I was doing before, but my husband found out laying on the bed, with slurred speech, I recall my head was really hurting badly, and it was like he was screaming, but he wasnt. It hurt my head to even move it, or talk, or hear another person talk to me. I just wanted to be left alone. My husband said I stiffened up, and my right side of my body was jerking alot. I dont recall any of this happening, I just recall opening my eyes to find him looking at me. He did call my mom who came over, and said to give me a adivan. He gave me one, and now Im feeling super tired, sluggist and "worn out". I so wish this hadnt of happened. But I think alot of this was due to everything Ive been dealing with, and also not being able to sleep well.

I think some changes are going to have to take place around here. I cant be the one who takes charge of everything. Its just too much for me to handle.
 
I really should have seen this coming. I knew with everything I had to deal with, I should have "slowed" things down and gave more responsibilities to my husband to do. Its just getting him to do those things, is whats a pain in the butt!
 
7 more school days of school run :)

Do you ever retreat (to bed, mindless TV, magazines, tea and who cares about the mess attitude and kids allowed in to cuddle mommy only) and simply say mommy is not well and let your hubby deal with it ALL for a few days? Like weekend forced duty, then hit him quick with how he feels about the load, may get him to officially take on (divide) some duties (when its all fresh and he feeling the pain of the load).

Sorry to hear, that was a royally crap way to start the day :(
 
{{{HUGS}}} yep, tell your hubby some changes are going to be taking place real soon. You just keep going on like this.

I had a few of those type of days when my children were growing up, except I didn't have ANY family nearby and my husband was a pilot.
 
So sorry Kristin, that sucks. It's very hard to carve out relaxation time for yourself, isn't it? Don't be afraid to let some things fall behind in the name of preserving your health.
 
Chaz1 said:
7 more school days of school run :)

Do you ever retreat (to bed, mindless TV, magazines, tea and who cares about the mess attitude and kids allowed in to cuddle mommy only) and simply say mommy is not well and let your hubby deal with it ALL for a few days? Like weekend forced duty, then hit him quick with how he feels about the load, may get him to officially take on (divide) some duties (when its all fresh and he feeling the pain of the load).

Sorry to hear, that was a royally crap way to start the day :(
Click to expand...

Ive been the one to deal with everthing around here since my husband was told by a heart doctor to stop dealing with alot of stress. Since then, Ive been the one to make sure everything gets taken care of. We had to sit down today with him, (myself and my mother) to explain to him that this added duties is not helping me at all. its making it worse. My mom was a stay at home mom and said she can see where Im coming from. But its not right for me to have to do everything around here, and not have time for myself, especially when having epiepsy. So, We have to arrange the house duties, and things around here to make sure Im not taking on alot of things to make sure this doesnt happen again. Ive been a stay at home mom since 2004, and it is tough. My husband seems to think he can go to work, and come home and do nothing. He doesnt realize how hard it is to have to take care of five people, the house duties, making sure the bills get paid, taking care of meeting with doctors, teachers, etc. its just alot ot take in. My mom told my husband to at least let me have some "me time" on a daily basis. I dont know if thats going to happen, but Im praying it does.
 
Thank you..... Ive been really sleepy and droggy feeling since taking the ativan, so Im going to try to get some rest and hopefully tomorrow I will feel much better! :)
 
Like my beloved Grandma would tell me, "Don't sweat the small stuff."

Make time for yourself and like someone above said, if something else suffers than so be it. Your health is more important than anything!
You won't be any good to anyone if you're in bed recovering.
(sorry to sound mean, but I'm just learning this myself)
And listen to your Momma. Good luck with everything.
 
What a day. I hope tomorrow is better and that somehow things can be rearranged to make life a little easier for you. Maybe you guys can arrange a schedule so that some days he can just relax and that some days so can you!
 
Kristin, I'm so sorry you had a terribly awful few days, hopefully some rest and a little bit of help from the hubs and you'll be feeling better in no time.

Stress does awful awful things (don't we all know that). And I know where you are coming from. I'm not a stay at home mom, but a single mom (and dad - yeah quirky I know) who works full-time, takes care of my woobert the remainder of the hours in the week, when I'm not paying bills, doing laundry, food shopping, or better yet food shopping for my 60+ year old parents.

I don't know if it'll work for your boys how well it's worked for my guy, but he knows that if "Maee" doesn't feel right, good, or has a headache that he needs to sit with me on the couch and be quiet. He's even brought me up to bed now a few times. And I had a bad run about 2 weeks ago (multiple days in a row of multiple seizures) he yelled at my mother and told her to take me to the doctor. But it might be something to try and talk to the boys about. Might work out better then you think it will. ;)

Chin up and feel better - heck feel GREAT!!!!

And lots and lots of hugs!!!!!!!!!
 
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Thank you everyone. Im praying it gets better as the days go by. My head is still killing me, and my eyes feel like there are rocks on them. I keep getting this strange feeling for the past hour or so... Its the same feeling I got right before I started having seizures last year during my VEEG. Only this time, its not as strong, but its the same feeling. I dont want to have seizures at night, but I would hate to just go to sleep feeling this way. Im thinking of taking half an ativan to see if it will help.
 
I hoping things will get better. I'm glad you are taking some things OFF of you.

When my husband didn't want to help me, I got so tired of asking. I hired someone to cut the grass and gave him the bill. He knows I will do it again, so I think he got my message.
 
jyearta said:
I hired someone to cut the grass and gave him the bill. He knows I will do it again, so I think he got my message.
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Thats something I should try if my husband doesnt want to help out with things around here! :) :roflmao:
 
Sometimes you have to be cruel (selfish) to be kind because and looking out for 5 is a huge job…

E doctors say to avoid stress like the plague to; so that makes 2 of you.

As they say do it ALL now and you will be doing it ALL forever and you (might) get some thanks now but quickly it’s ALL expected. As a stay at home Mum u got one of the biggest jobs in the world (great admiration) you would want to be setting some real boundaries for future, saying no here and there...Its liberating…simple do it yourself please and if u not know how I show you (then u DO it).

"Me time" be praying you get (take) this....and that your headache and sensations disappear to let you get some rest.


When they all out of the house, don’t rush to clean and organize, take 30/60min to sit and smell the roses (whatever you fancy)
 
Hi Kristin.. I am so sorry you have had more than your share of stress and seizures the past few days and now with a weird feeling in your head on top of everything else.

My husband was very similar when my boys were small and I was a stay-at-home Mom.
He pretty much thought it was no problem for me to take care of everyone and be somewhat isolated from any adults, except on occasion when I volunteered. At one time he had to change shifts so was home during the day for over a year......it was music to my ears when he said 'I know why women choose to work" (outside of home). He was serious and not serious at the same time.. just had his eyes opened I guess. I really believe he had no idea how much I did or how lively the boys could be and all that went on each day taking care of a home.

Thoughts and prayers.
MaryK
 
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I just sent her a PM, sounds like she is living my life. I would love for my husband to take it all... but he is too lazy (and admits it). I have told him stress could be what triggers my seizures (we have no clue), and he just doesn't get it.

So I send her THE biggest hugs!!!

Chaz1 said:
7 more school days of school run :)

Do you ever retreat (to bed, mindless TV, magazines, tea and who cares about the mess attitude and kids allowed in to cuddle mommy only) and simply say mommy is not well and let your hubby deal with it ALL for a few days? Like weekend forced duty, then hit him quick with how he feels about the load, may get him to officially take on (divide) some duties (when its all fresh and he feeling the pain of the load).

Sorry to hear, that was a royally crap way to start the day :(
Click to expand...
 
Thank you all. Im going to have to do my best and change things around this place. Our oldest will be 8 next month, our middle son turns 7 tomorrow, and our youngest is 5 yrs old. Ever since 2004, Ive been a stay at home mom of three little boys. My mom was a stay at home mom til we got to be around the age of 8 or 9 years old. It was then, that she took a part time job during the school day hours. I just have to sit down my husband and explain things to him. He pretty much is use to me doing Everything! I sat down and thought about it one day... what if something, "god forbid" were to happen to me... how would he function? How would he able to do all of what I do around here, take care of three kids, take care of school stuff, and still function with his job? He admited to me, he wouldnt know what to do. He hates doing laundry. thats the one thing he hates to do. So we agree'd years ago... that since I hated to do dishes, even though we do have a dishwasher, I still hate to do them... we agree'd he would do the dishes, I would do the laundry. Doing the laundry doesnt bug me that much. Its just the thought of doing it for five people... it seems like Im always doing it. He on the other hand, can let the dishes pile up and it not bother him. I hate having a dirty house. He knows that. thats one thing he likes about me.... always knowing he will come home to a clean house! LOL. But its time I put my foot down and show him I cant do all of this and be able to take care of myself. Ive put myself on the last burner and the result is having seizures. Not what I wanted to happen at all! So its time to put some of the resposibilities on his plate, and also show the kids its time they help out with the age appropriate duties around the house too. I grew up picking up after myself, helping clean, etc. Im no way going to let these kids think Im a maid around here and they dont have to do anything!
 
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