Matthew74
Stalwart
- Messages
- 597
- Reaction score
- 26
- Points
- 93
The older I get the more I deal with this...
I feel like there just is no place for me to be and belong. I'm not depressed, or being mopey. It's a real problem I have to deal with. Mostly I'm talking about working, since I don't have a family of my own.
I keep facing the reality that that the jobs I'm poorly suited for are the only one's available. I can't seem to get a real job doing anything I 'm good at. (I've tried A LOT of things.)
A great example is musical instrument repair. I'm good at it. I finished half a training program with a 4.0 and had to quit on account of back surgery. I tried to go back and finish, and got EXTREMELY close, but I couldn't. So on, and so forth. I tried selling instruments on the internet. Never got a job. There were several times where if someone had just given me a chance it might have worked out. I got close to getting hired. Things like this keep happening, and it's not my fault. I'm not perfect, but I've actually done well, all things considered.
Another example. I just worked two years at a tech company . It wasn't my "thing", but I made it work. My supervisor refused to train me. She did train the person they hired after me. Etc, etc. It ended up that, even though I had seniority, I was laid off. Basically it was wrong. I was intentionally prevented from performing certain duties. This was not my fault. I did a good job. I made a lot of improvements (my co-worker did not). Nevertheless, I was laid off. For most people this would be an annoying blip, or maybe a problem, but with epilepsy it's a huge deal. I can't just get any old job.
So I feel like I just can't find a place to be. It's not any particular thing, it's that I can't make anything work. Making friends has gotten more difficult as I've gotten older and had to move around. I'm not married, etc. Now I'm getting old. IDK how I'm going to get a suitable job after COVID.
Does anyone feel like this?
I feel like there just is no place for me to be and belong. I'm not depressed, or being mopey. It's a real problem I have to deal with. Mostly I'm talking about working, since I don't have a family of my own.
I keep facing the reality that that the jobs I'm poorly suited for are the only one's available. I can't seem to get a real job doing anything I 'm good at. (I've tried A LOT of things.)
A great example is musical instrument repair. I'm good at it. I finished half a training program with a 4.0 and had to quit on account of back surgery. I tried to go back and finish, and got EXTREMELY close, but I couldn't. So on, and so forth. I tried selling instruments on the internet. Never got a job. There were several times where if someone had just given me a chance it might have worked out. I got close to getting hired. Things like this keep happening, and it's not my fault. I'm not perfect, but I've actually done well, all things considered.
Another example. I just worked two years at a tech company . It wasn't my "thing", but I made it work. My supervisor refused to train me. She did train the person they hired after me. Etc, etc. It ended up that, even though I had seniority, I was laid off. Basically it was wrong. I was intentionally prevented from performing certain duties. This was not my fault. I did a good job. I made a lot of improvements (my co-worker did not). Nevertheless, I was laid off. For most people this would be an annoying blip, or maybe a problem, but with epilepsy it's a huge deal. I can't just get any old job.
So I feel like I just can't find a place to be. It's not any particular thing, it's that I can't make anything work. Making friends has gotten more difficult as I've gotten older and had to move around. I'm not married, etc. Now I'm getting old. IDK how I'm going to get a suitable job after COVID.
Does anyone feel like this?