Kate
New
- Messages
- 117
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 0
Yesterday I went to my doctor, and he told me that he thinks I have depression. He said it may be from some of the medicine I have been on.. but he is not sure. He also said it's perfectly normal for someone in my situation to be depressed.
He's going to put me on an anti-depressant when I get back from the IU Med Center. He didn't want to start me on any new medicines right before I go up there. I go there in six days.
I have always been an extremely happy person.. I've always been able to find the positive side in everything. I've had random injuries because I was always so active, and I was always SO positive. Even after my car accident, and with my broken ankle, everyone always told me they just couldn't believe how happy and positive I seemed.
But ever since I've had epilepsy.. I just haven't been the same. It's not the seizures really.. it's more of being so locked up in this house. I literally feel like an animal trapped in a cage. I have said before, I live in a VERY small town with no public transportation. My parents are very busy people.. All my friends are hours away going to school, and here I am.
I try to stay busy, and take up activities. I try to connect to friends on the phone, the internet, etc. But I still just feel so extremely lonely..
I start classes in a few days, but of course they have to be online, because I can't drive to the college. I miss my sorority sisters, and the social interaction you get at school.
Sorry this seems like one big whine. I know it could be worse. I just seem at my wits end. I try to put on a smile, and pretend like everything is fine and dandy, but really it's not. I even have some things coming up (like a concert I have AMAZING tickets for) that I should be looking forward to, but I'm just emotionless about it. I don't know if it's the meds causing this or what, but either way.. I am not myself.
I want the old Kate back.
Has anyone else gone through this? Am I a total freak?
He's going to put me on an anti-depressant when I get back from the IU Med Center. He didn't want to start me on any new medicines right before I go up there. I go there in six days.
I have always been an extremely happy person.. I've always been able to find the positive side in everything. I've had random injuries because I was always so active, and I was always SO positive. Even after my car accident, and with my broken ankle, everyone always told me they just couldn't believe how happy and positive I seemed.
But ever since I've had epilepsy.. I just haven't been the same. It's not the seizures really.. it's more of being so locked up in this house. I literally feel like an animal trapped in a cage. I have said before, I live in a VERY small town with no public transportation. My parents are very busy people.. All my friends are hours away going to school, and here I am.
I try to stay busy, and take up activities. I try to connect to friends on the phone, the internet, etc. But I still just feel so extremely lonely..
I start classes in a few days, but of course they have to be online, because I can't drive to the college. I miss my sorority sisters, and the social interaction you get at school.
Sorry this seems like one big whine. I know it could be worse. I just seem at my wits end. I try to put on a smile, and pretend like everything is fine and dandy, but really it's not. I even have some things coming up (like a concert I have AMAZING tickets for) that I should be looking forward to, but I'm just emotionless about it. I don't know if it's the meds causing this or what, but either way.. I am not myself.
I want the old Kate back.
Has anyone else gone through this? Am I a total freak?