Experiencing myoclonic jerks, but not diagnosed with epilepsy

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Hi there! I'm new to this site and not really sure how this works, so sorry if I'm doing this wrong or whatnot..

but anyways, hi. :) I’m 19, almost 20, and have been plagued by what I call “twitches” for almost two years. These twitches are involuntary and I don’t know how to describe it, but it’s almost as if someone is possessing my body. Every muscle of my body clenches, my arms/hands clench at objects or at myself, I inhale a sharp intake of breath (it sounds almost like a hiccup), my eyes go wide or at least I think so, my heart beats so loud in my chest, my blood is pulsating in my body to the point where I can feel a sizzle in my hands. It’s so odd, because when I get these twitches, my whole body becomes a weapon. I’m infinitely afraid of hurting myself and others. I’ve had bad situations happen, I’ve spilled boiling water over myself on numerous occasions and almost on my friend, I’ve had intensely violent twitches where my twitch literally makes me fall over or lose my balance, I'm prone to accidentally throwing my phone or whatever is in my hand across the room with force, I drop things regularly. My twitches occur mostly when I am deprived of sleep (sometimes I feel fine but my twitches tell me that my body is tired) or in stressful situations where I’m nervous (usually only happens if I've been sleep deprived that day), and they are especially bad and persistently violent after a night of drinking. They do not occur daily, sometimes I’ll go a week without having any twitches or maybe only minor ones where just my leg moves slightly, or my arm, barely noticeable at all. And then one day it’ll be particularly bad and intense; as I said, particularly when I am sleep deprived. For example, I went to bed at about half 2/3 last Wednesday and got up at 9:00, and I experienced jerks consistently enough for about an hour, then they faded off and I'd only get the odd one or two throughout the day. They were quite severe in the morning and I ended up dropping a lot of stuff, including a hot water bottle that almost spilled boiling water on me. I genuinely feel like I’m dangerous when I have these “twitches”, which I know sounds ridiculous, but it’s true.

It has gradually worsened—last year my twitches were barely noticeable and only occurred after a night of drinking, but nothing on the intense twitches I experience today. Sometimes going out in public is too much but a lot of the time they only occur in the morning (so usually I wait until they've subsided and busy myself with whatever I can) with the odd one during the day. A day after drinking however they are simply unrelenting and I have no choice but to stay at home and live with it. I often cry with frustration. It has made me drink alcohol a lot less often which is no harm to tell the truth haha. In public situations I usually have to either laugh it off, apologize and briefly explain, or conjure a silly excuse like “oh I just tripped” (would explain the arms flailing). Part of me almost thinks it’s psychological, like the more aware I am of my twitches, the more I anticipate them. (Maybe that seems a bit barbarous to some of you but.. I have no one to talk to this about so often I come up with my own concepts :p). I thought it was dehydration, so I drink almost 2 litres of water a day but there’s still no let up. I feel utterly helpless. I try to explain to my friends what it's like by telling them that it's like a hypnic jerk, except it occurs when I'm awake. It’s gotten to the point where it inhibits me from my life. My friends find it funny (which increases my nervousness, and increases the twitching) or else they try to convince me that it’s normal and happens to everyone (last I checked dropping pasta all over the floor because you can’t trust your body to operate in a cohesive fashion isn’t normal) and people who don’t know me just look at me like I’m a zoo exhibit. I’ve stopped drinking coffee and other caffeinated drinks; I’m a healthy girl but I have started to be more aware of my diet so as to decipher what is causing these twitches (no matter what I cut out, the twitches still haven’t let up).

It saddens me that I have to live my life constantly pertaining to these irksome twitches. I’m afraid of driving because I think I would genuinely be a danger to whoever is in the car with me. I'm afraid of getting a job that involves waitressing or holding stuff because I'm terrified of dropping stuff and potentially injuring people.

I have never had a seizure that I know of, but I would like to identify whatever is wrong with me. I've been attending university so the people that know the most about these twitches are my roommates, my parents don't know at all but I'm sure if I told them it would explain the oddness of my actions sometimes. I do believe I'm experiencing myoclonic jerks, as I've done a good bit of research on them for months and a lot of videos on youtube resemble precisely what I'm experiencing.

Anyways, that's my story. I encourage anyone who has epilepsy or who has experienced something of a similar nature to comment. I have never really engaged with anyone who understands what I'm going through and it would be nice to hear your stories. Thank you and I'm sorry for talking so much.
 
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Thank you so much for your response! For some reason, the website you linked isn't working for me, the page just won't load (I checked the website downforeveryoneorjustme and that tells me it's down for just me.. I don't know why). But what you said was very helpful. I've been thinking about that too, but I've never been in any car accident, had any prominent falls, or have had anything that could potentially injure my spinal cord, but who knows.. it could be equally as likely. I'll just have to go get checked out regardless. Thanks again for the help :)
 

masterjen

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Myoclonus does not have to be injury-related. It can be due to other factors as well, such as faulty signaling due to a disease process, medication or other drugs, and it can even be stress-related.
 

Cint

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I've had all types of seizures, even myoclonics and I've never had a head injury. My seizures started when I was 22 years of age, out of the blue, in college. They started as simple partial and gradually worsened to CP and then TC where I was seriously injured. So please, get this checked out ASAP! Have your glucose levels checked also as hypoglycemia could cause some problems like this, too.

And go to this website for more info:
http://www.epilepsy.com/learn/types-seizures
 
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