Stuff Epileptics Say : )

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Hahaha COurt, when I'm being a crazy postictal nutter I always tell epilepsy jokes. Apparently I get (and remain, at least for a few minutes( positively delighted because they laugh instead of stand there awkwardly haha

"What do you call a stoned epileptic?"
"Shake n' Bake!"

"What should you do if someone with E seizes in your bath-tub?"
"Throw in your laundry and soap!!"

I must say that the laundry joke is my favourite- that's the one I always tell when I'm out of my head haha ;)
 
Those are good ones. I think my mom would like some of those. thanks seizuriffic.I wonder if there will be a stand up for the seizure community. Probobly not. But I think it would bring us closer together.
 
seizurrific said:
- "Crap....just dropped another glass. I really just need to buy a few plastic tumblers."
Click to expand...
I've actually taken to stealing champagne (my drink of choice) glasses from pubs to replace all the ones I break at home. I've been through a good half a dozen in the past couple of months. It's a good thing my local doesn't keep a close eye I their glassware!!
 
Other Person: Hey what's your problem?
Me: Im, sorry, what did I do?
Other Person: You threw that ink-pen at me
Me: Oh no, I would never do that, it was my hand, it threw it not me.
 
"We need to have an epilepsy comedian- they can visit the different events/conventions. It would be totally great! I volunteer Seize for the job."

"You kidding? I wouldn't remember half the shit I'd thought up..."
 
"I just need to sit down..."


[Whumph/crash/shatter/thud/bang/moan/whimper/groan/wail/shriek]

"Christ...."
 
seizurrific said:
"What should you do if someone with E seizes in your bath-tub?"
"Throw in your laundry and soap!!"
Click to expand...

How do you differentiate between regular and delicates?.....

Maybe save the delicates for some post-ictal cycle?
 
Lost one shoe, toe missing, last seen underneath desk on left foot!
 
"We did ------ on Monday."
"Seriously?! I can't remember any of that."
"I know, you've asked me four times and I've told you as many."
"That's what happens when you have back to back seizures..."
 
Remember: I've locked the door!
Did I lock the door?
Go back and check if door is locked ...
Remember: I've locked the door!
Did I lock the door?
Go back and check if door is locked ...
Remember: I've locked the door!
Did I lock the door?
Go back and check if door is locked ...

and over and over and over ...
 
Dolores said:
Remember: I've locked the door!
Did I lock the door?
Go back and check if door is locked ...
Remember: I've locked the door!
Did I lock the door?
Go back and check if door is locked ...
Remember: I've locked the door!
Did I lock the door?
Go back and check if door is locked ...

and over and over and over ...
Click to expand...
I do that a lot :roflmao:.

When I finish work for the day/night I will usually double/triple check all the rooms to make sure everything is turned of (heaters, cd players, lights) & I've locked the cabinet in my office before I leave lol. If I leave after my boss I'll also check the door a couple of times just to make sure it is locked lol.
 
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I've got that down to about 3 times now. I locked the door. then,did I lock the door? Yes mom you locked the door. Well I better check it and make sure it's all right. lol
 
"What would Freud have to say about what comes out of my mouth while I'm postictal!?"

Brilliant!
 
LOL! I wrote that because I've said stuff that 1) Freud would have a f*cking field day with and 2) some seriously "incriminating" stuff ;)


"Nope, happened during a seizure. Doesn't count."
 
i know i just read something very funny here about my seizures
i wish i could remember what it was so i can tell my wife
 
What a great thread!! I'll have to ask my husband if I have any good ones.

Apparently before this last one I went 'Damn it..... damn it!!" with my 6 yr old standing right there.

I am also now much more aware of why I can NEVER remember how to get anywhere. So thankful for my GPS....except I'm not driving right now....again...
 
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